My Heart Bleeds

Dear Piglet,

I have no words within my grasp to explain how much I miss you. It has been over 3 years since we last had a chance to be near each other and I feel more pain day by day. I wish I could pick up that phone and hear your voice, get in that car and see your eyes, open your front door and feel you in my arms again.........

..........but it would only intensify the pain. A pain that could only be with me... a pain that you may have forgotten or may have replaced with the joy and beauty of your stunning baby. You wanted another and now you have another.... i want to hold her too, knowing she's a part of you... feeling your love within her...

..........my emptyness never stops, but I cannot leave here. I cannot leave my life, my family. They win with their innocense...you win with my silence ....and no matter where I am, I always will lose

there are days when I cannot breathe as you are my air

there are days when I cannot move as you are my will

I must lead this life in hopes that I will provide for them and be silent for you

I lost you so long ago, my heart bleeds more now.... then ever,

PB