Never Told Anyone

I was 15. It was new yrs eve best friend was seeing this guy who had a car, so he phones my friend and asks if they wanna meet up, but he was bringing his friend, for me!
They drove us to a secluded wood, in the middle of nowhere and demanded sex. I was in the front passenger seat and my friend was in the back. We refused, and they threatened to leave us there. We got out of the car and starting walking off. They came after us and said they were joking. So we got back in the car. They drove us to a garage and went to buy booze. When they came back, they said they had bought condoms. They said as repayment for driving us about, we should sleep with them. My friend gave in, as unbeknown to me, she had already started a sexual relationship with her boyfriend. His friend said he loved virgins and only slept with them.
They drove us back to the woods and even my friend was saying I should do it, that everyone had to lose their virginity at some point. So I gave in and said yes.
My friend started having sex in the back seat with her boyfriend. Sickened, I said no again, but I was in the middle of nowhere and worried for my friend. The driver pushed back the seat and held me down and raped me. My friend was crying at this point, and I can remember her trying to help me.
Afterwards, they drove us home as if nothing had happened, and I can remember not going into my house as my parents were there. I thought they would not believe me, or blame me in some way. How I wish I had told them.
I walked around our village for hours, sobbing and crying. When I finally snuck home, my mum heard me crying in my room And came to see what was wrong. I couldnt speak but she asked me questions and I just nodded.
She asked if it was about a boy, I nodded. Eventually, she asked if I had slept with a boy. I nodded. But the look of disgust on her face froze me. I couldn't tell her, and every day after that night, it became even harder to try.
I wanted to tell her, for her to say it would be alright.
Then it just became too late to tell her. I took an overdose 2 months later.
Afterwards, in the hospital room, when I came round, my dad basically disowned me and walked out. My mum followed him. She choose him over me. That broke my heart more than being raped.
After that, I felt worthless and decided not to tell anyone as they wouldn't care.
This has helped me. Telling my story to other people who have experienced this horrific injustice.
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20 Responses May 11, 2012

Well two out of two I was raped and a couple months later my mom choked me and I got put in the system I haven't seen her since

You're incredibly strong, and you're making differences in other people's lives by posting that. Don't ever forget that. :)

Not all people
Break hearts
Crush souls
Betray trust
Shatter hearts

And no matter what,

i have like the same thing going on now... what did you do? are you still having symptomsfrom what happened? have your parents came back into your life?

NO more curse and I'm sorry for your experience. I only can be your listener, but how i wish I could be a man behind you and potect you. You really shouldn't deserve this.

Stupid moms choosing their stupid partner over you your an angle and your parents and the boy who rapped you are going to rot in hell i promise ;)

So u were alone the rest of your life in a house by your self

If i found the people who would hurt you, i would beat the crap out of them. People like them make me a shame to be called a man. I'm sorry that i am can't be there to comfort you, but i will always reach out my hand for you to take. I may be young, but people like you are always whom i will always treat as human.

I'm sure they would have cared if you had told them you had been raped. Your parents didn't know that - they must have thought you did it out of choice. That you wanted to. But what happened was foul. Only someone truly horrible, freaky and gross would rape another person. We are all here to care and to help. Big hugs. x

Don't forget that there are always people willing to help you, you just have to look (-:

so sad :( I'm sorry.

I'm very sorry to know that ....I would welcome any message from you. Thank you. I am open to discuss anything you would like.

you are a strong beautiful women, your parents are monsters . you will succeed

Hi I'm Mezniquee Mattis & I'm so sorry what happen to you. There is still time to gain back power within it all. I'm the host of vir?gin sex 101 after dark on blog talk raido & you can catch up with me at check them out you always have a safe home there.

It's so hard , just pray a lot , God only know the pain u have been through ...

What happened with you was worse that could happen to a girl... a young girl for whom world is not more than a fairy tale... and yeah it was really got worsen when your family didn't support you... but you are grown up now... you should stand for yourself... its never late when it comes about family... at least let them know what happened ... and it wasn't your fault... i know it cant make your pain less but you can feel better.... you should make yourself strong and make your pain positive.... help other small girls.... tell them to be careful... conduct some programs in school.... i know you have lived all your life with this but i know you will feel better if you will save even a single girl going on your path... <br />
<br />
at the end i will just say... i can fit into your shoe so i can only suggest you what possibly best you can do to make yourself feel better... but if you feel like talking and need a good friend... click on my name any time and leave a message ... have a good life my dear... god bless...

so sorry i know how you. i rape by someone by a friend.iam a man.rossco

Like you i was raped, i was 13 years old and never told anyone until it was to late to do anything. about 6 months later my mum asked me all these questions i asked them but i couldn't tell her that i was raped as i was raped my her best friend and was scared that he'd do it again, as that what he told me he'd do. <br />
<br />
10 years i worked up the courage to tell my parents, i firstly told my dad, ( knowing that he wasn't able to say or do anything as he was in a coma in ICU) after i got through telling my dad who actually turned out to be the hardest one to tell. I told my mum what happened. She wasn't angry like i thought she'd be with me. she sat there and listen to what i had to say and cried. and said sorry for letting that man into our life. My mum and i didn't have the greatest relationship when i was growing up, but she now understands why. <br />
<br />
I might not have the greatest relationship with you mum, but until you tell her trust me when i say this you're never going to truly get over it, and the second you tell her a weight will be lifted of your shoulders. She's also your mum and she love you no matter what, we may disappoint our parents every now and then, but in the long run she your mum and will all ways love you! Even when you think she doesn't......

also feel sorry about u, hope u will get it over, tomorrow is another day

Oh I'm so sorry this happened to you. I wish I had the words to describe how your story made me feel. Horrified is an understatement. I wish you the best in your healing process.