Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Need Help

My girlfriend was just raped tonight. She was at home when her parents invited an unknowingly ex-boyfriend to their house. He offered to take her to his house, and their parents agreed. She told them no she didn't want to go, but they insisted that she did. She told me through text message. I tried keeping her calm, I told her to not drink or eat anything she offered her. I told her to check in with me in about 15-20 minutes. I kept track..after she went over her time I was starting to feel gut was telling me right. Her rapist sent me two texts from her phone. I was disgusted, scared, and useless. She was dropped off at her house, and the cops are after this scum. I hope he gets what he deserves. But please I need your help walking me through how to comfort her..I live over 6 hours away with no means of stable transportation and my only means of communication are Cellular pre-paid phone (61.2 minutes left), Webcam, and facebook. I really need someones help right now..
Itzdraco Itzdraco 16-17, M 9 Responses Jan 15, 2013

Your Response


It was a lie..she basically told me that so I'd pity her..she took it from her mother's experience. Short story, she felt so bad because of it, it ruined our relationship even though I loved her, I couldn't trust her.

I don't know what to say...although ive been in similar situationts my self...

She didnt cheat..which was a positive..she just lied.

Yeah i know what its like to be tested over and over just to see how much i loved...and they werent little lies they were pretty serious....lies but still how could i have known...?

If anyone ever touched my girl in anyway that she didnt want kill them with my own hands....but id make them cry for forgiveness and make them regret it....i still would not pity such honorless trash

Ask her what you can do to support her. If she does not know, just bring her flowers, go for a walk with her, tell her what she means to you. Do not pressure her for anything and let her set the pace.

I'm sorry this happened to your girlfriend:( Be patient with her because she's gonna have good and bad days. Talk to her about seeing a rape crisis counselor. Look up the number for the local rape crisis shelter in the area.

Things are going fine now. She's smiling again and it makes me feel wonderful. I will continue to love and comfort her. I thank everyone for their help and kind words.

I know how you feel dude...because my girlfriend has suffered sexual abuse from her disgusting step-father. I feel helpless and advice is to be here for her no matter what, pretty much what chuckle12 said. I hope she'll recover and felt safe with you, because she's lucky to have you caring for her. I hope that scumbag gets caught and put in chair. Disgraceful human being...

Oh come on ZanderJGavin, sensitive much?

I'm sorry to hear about your girlfriends ordeal. Wish I had someone as concerned as you when I went through that myself. All I can say is, support her in every way. It'll be hard to be there all the time considering your lack of transport etc...but keep telling her how you feel about her. After going through something like that, one needs emotional support and to be reminded constantly how much they're loved. Good luck buddy

I'm going to say, she's lying.

She ****** him willingly, felt guilty, claimed rape.

Not the first time a girl has used that play.

I am sorry to hear this awful experience your girlfriend went through. I think you are very brave. Please also look after yourself. Because often when one tries to support another loved one through such traumatic experience, the own health also suffers. Just remember to find from time to time a space for you where you can breath and find ways to see the beauty of life, that usually gets so much overshadowed by such experience.
Check out "Mindfulness", it might help you and maybe her in the long term. This not some kind of religious drivel. It is about learning to pay attention to your body and soul. It can make you feel more confident about yourself and more equipped to deal with difficult situations.

If you have some time, you might want to check out Jon Kabat-Zinn
"The Healing Power of Mindfulness"