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Needing A Change

I lost my grandmother 5days before christmas.She has been fighting cancer for over a year now and finally has lost the fight.She raised me and has always been what I consider my only realy family.I have a sister and an aunt out of state,and now that she's gone and everyone has went home,I feel so alone.I don't think anyone understands how alone I really feel.My family returned to their homes,husbands and lives.While I'm left here as a single mom with worthless friends and my only support system gone.I need a change.I'm trying to redo everything in my life.Go through my baggage if you will,reorganize it,and lighten the load.Learning to accept the horror and unfairness of cancer,the fact of raising my daughter alone,and a lot of childhood stuff I haven't even began to touch.Its just hard.I think maybe a move,A fresh start somewhere new would be good for me.For us.I've always wanted to relocate but even before the cancer I just couldn't leave her.Not sure how I'm going to make it happen but I've been through harder things.There's nothing left here for me and I feel so alone in every aspect of my life.I really do just need a change.
mighthavebeen mighthavebeen 26-30 Jan 17, 2013

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