Someone whom I love dearly passed away in the early hours of the morning. I was im complete and utter shock, it was unexpected. I ask "WHY?" and "HOW?". I thought they were lying. It still hasn't sunk in.

I don't know how to grieve. I would love someone to help me, tell me how I should be feeling?

Because all I feel now is numb, disbelief.. I've been keeping busy all day and not letting my mind wander into sadness. I don't even feel sad, yet. I feel like such an idiot for this. Should I not smile? How the **** should I be behaving. I feel like a selfish cow.

I miss, i love. I will never see them again. I don't believe it, how could someone just die? What is death? Was it painful? I don't want to cry.


Mediocre Mediocre
22-25, F
1 Response Feb 12, 2010

I am sorry to hear about your loss... The worst thing you can do is hold your feelings in... I know...