I lost my little brother to a heroin overdose two years ago. He was nineteen, only a year younger than me. I had no memory of a life without him. He was my best friend and we were so close. I couldn't have asked for a better relationship with a sibling, and I'm saddened by those who take for granted that special bond. My brother was funny and handsome, he was so gentle and had this huge heart and love for those smaller and in need. After he passed away we learned he used to vacuum and clean up one of his friends grandmothers houses. One of his friends had a mentally disabled sister and she had a crush on him, he would hang out with her and talk to her. He was special to me because he was my brother, but he was special in his own right too. He was such a light, even with his addiction. In him I found a new empathy for people who are addicts. I've learned that this is a disease and we need to address it. It can't be overcome in a day and not every addict is a bad person.

July 14th, 2012
I came home after midnight from a late shift at work. I pointed at my brother passed out on the couch and giggled to my mother. At three in the afternoon that day I heard my brothers voice say "Momo it's time to wake up." He was gone by the time I finally woke up, he had gone to a friends house. I had work at five thirty and he had work at six. I got dropped off and my mom went to go pick him up from his friends house. At 7:30pm a man I had never met before asked to speak to me somewhere privately. He pulled up a chair and had me sit down and told me he was a pastor from my mothers church. He told me "Your brother overdosed on heroin at 7pm tonight", my mind was unresponsive I couldn't focus. "He's at the hospital? He's okay right? They're taking care of him right?" Because my first thought was that not everyone dies from an overdose. The pastor said no, he passed away at seven that night.

While I was working my brother was struggling for his life and lost it. He had been gone a half hour before I was told. I didn't get to say goodbye while he was still here.

I called the pastor a liar and then I cried body wrenching sobs. He took me to the hospital. No one was in the room with my brother. My father was in the middle of a bipolar mania and had already said goodbye and my mom couldn't stand the sight. Me, the girl terrified of death. The person who couldn't pick up her mice to bury them after they passed away. I stayed with my brother for the next four hours. Sobbing and pleading and holding his had. Begging and screaming for hours. I lost a piece of me that day. My beautiful blonde brother. My sunshine faced baby brother. I've learned to live with losing my other half. I miss him every day though. My heart is ever tender in his memory. I with I had had more than 19 years with him. It wasn't enough. That sadness forever touches those who lose someone we love so damn much.
MonetChere MonetChere
22-25, F
6 Responses Aug 17, 2014

I'm sorry for.your loss. I also lost my younger brother in may he was 22 years old. I feel your pain and heart ache

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I recently lost my youngest brother to heroin, and now my life will never be the same! Its so helpful for sites like this, there are so many days I feel like nobody understands, or are judging. He was a loving,caring, funny kid, who I know in his right mind, would never want to see his family go through this. I can honestly say, that has been the most awful day of my life getting that call. Thank you for those that share their stories, I will never atop hurting, or ever feel the same again, but it helps ease the pain with support of people who understand! Thank you for taking the time to share your story, and to all that take the time.

My daughter just lost her little brother and that hurts me so much. I'm very sorry for your loss. He was very angry and mean the last couple of years but I know it was the drugs. We love him and miss him so much...how do you cope? We are struggling

Thank you for sharing your story. I am here waiting on news about my niece who overdosed a couple days ago and is on life support. She was dead when they found her but was resuscitated. The only hope we have is a miracle. Hearing your story as well as others lets me know i am not alone and maybe i will be able to get through this pain. The worst i think I've ever felt. I wish you a peaceful heart.

I'm very sorry to hear about your brother, he sounded like a sweetheart. I'm glad you found this page. I created it this group when my boyfriend overdosed because I WAS SO LOST. I know your pain. Reading this stories remind me that I am not alone.

I'm so sorry to hear, he sounded like a man with a true heart of gold, not everyone is so willing to go help a friends grandmother or befriend a mentally disabled little girl. It's men like this that show having an addiction doesn't describe the person, their strengths and good deeds do. I'm glad you and him had a close relationship, it sounds like you admire him and have a very similar personality as him, he will always be there in everything you do, he will always be there for you when you need him