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I Lost Someone To Suicide

Like A Sister

By: AwesomeAngel
Written on June 29th, 2012
We did everything together sleepovers, mall, movies, everything. We were just like Lucy and Ethel. She took medication for depression but I never thought she would off herself. She'd have her highs and lows. I would never forget that day as long as I live. She left a suicide note and apologized to her family saying she was sorry. And thanked me for being her sister and she was sorry for taking the coward's way out. She said she was in pain and wanted relief. If I could go back in time I would maybe I don't know try to help her. Maybe I could have done something maybe? I don't ever want to lose someone like that again. They say time heals all wounds, I don't think so. Sometimes I feel as though I let her down. Rest In Peace:'(
By: AwesomeAngel
Age: 22-25 , Female
502 people have read this story

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8 responses
  • FashionQueen86
    FashionQueen86

    Sometimes I have that fear for my sister. She's dating someone right now who is battling depression. Anytime he has problems, they are her problems. I find her always having these depressing moments when she never was like that before. She's usually a bubbly person and makes people laugh. But sometimes she just allows herself to let go and dwell in his problems. He has no job, dropped out of school, isn't really doing anything for himself and he's scared. He constantly needs someone to hold his hand.



    It was recently that I heard he's been put in the hospital, I guess having some down time. He's staying with an Uncle and Grandmother, which both are NOT healthy at all. I find it occasional to hear of his grandmother being rushed to the hospital. I highly doubt she has much time left. And if she dies, her boyfriend will go nuts and she will she. It's like their feelings are totally connected without any independence. And it's not like his grandmother has been the nicest person to her anyway, despite all the money and resources my sister willingly gave to them.



    My sister loves him to death and if anything were to happen to him, such as him becoming homeless or killing himself, I don't know what my sister would do. I would not put it past me if she did off herself. The only way we'd know she's safe is if we invite her boyfriend to stay with us when his folks are gone becuase she has done some STUPID things just to be with him.

    Jul 17, 2012
    1 like
    • AwesomeAngel
      AwesomeAngel

      OMG. That is horrible. I bet yall have talked to her to leave him and it has done no good. I seriously hope she doesn't hurt herself and something will click in her to leave him. He is just a burden. He probably tells lies to his grandparents on her thats why they treat her bad. I had this other friend would ANYTHIING to keep her man. He cheated, had kids on her, and he would play off oh her affection for him. LIke leave for stupid *** reasons. He she would plead and be him to stay. It was so embarrassing to see. He would pack all of his stuff like at 2 times a month and move. She eventually though met someone else and was totally done. That's when he started begging and crying he'd do right. Too late by then.

      Jul 17, 2012
      1 like
    • FashionQueen86
      FashionQueen86

      I think some guys don't realize what they have until the woman decides to leave. Some women would make themselves slaves, dragging by a man's troubles and immaturity. But once she's gone, men suddenly realize how empty life is, that's if they've grown some.

      I'm not really sure about my sister's case. He's really nice to her, sends her things and they talk on the phone all the dain time. But he's just not ready to grow up. She's the one taking the greyhound down there to go see him, he won't do it.

      Jul 17, 2012
      1 like
    • AwesomeAngel
      AwesomeAngel

      You are so right most don't know they had a good thing until it's gone. Out of all of the things she has done for him the least he could do is take the bus trip down you know?

      Jul 17, 2012
      1 like
  • gmckdude711
    gmckdude711

    About 2 weeks prior to my HS's 2008 graduation, a guy due to graduate with that class committed suicide. At the graduation, the principal revealed that the now deceased guy suffered from depression, as did our principal. Listening to that made me realize that I was struggling with depression and it began a quest that still continues to try to work through it for me. I haven't had issues with cutting but have had dealt with it as outlined in my story "dealing with it myself" which talks about my battles and my hopes to overcome them.



    Seeing your feature story "I would if I could" wishes that I had an available night that I could just reach out to you and just tenderly share some love so that we can alleviate each others' pain (read my story "Mutual Alleviation is my Goal" at http://tinyurl.com/7nnkqo3)

    Jun 29, 2012
    1 like
  • SupermanDC
    SupermanDC

    I'm so sad about this ... I know it is hard for you to write this and that alone is not an easy thing to do. I lost a neighbor to suicide about 4 years ago and I had lunch with him a week ago and we had a great time together ... I could not believe when his wife told me about it. I cried ... and most importantly our friendship started to grow ... and this.



    I feel for you and thanks for sharing this ... this is a good reminder of how life can be fragile ... you did well in writing this ...

    Jun 29, 2012
    1 like
    • AwesomeAngel
      AwesomeAngel

      Thank you very much fr your kind words. You have no idea how hard it was to write this. I keep a lot things to myself but I felt compelled to write this for her. I miss her.

      Jun 29, 2012
      1 like