Lost My Father In April

So, my father took his own life just 2 1/2 weeks ago and I just came back to work this week. I feel like I am in a fog and am not sure how I am going to be able to function and go on with my daily life...I miss him so much but in the back of my mind I half expect him to answer the phone when I call my parents house..He was the most important person in my life and I can't yet believe I will never hug him or hear his voice again.
LisaLisa LisaLisa
31-35, F
1 Response May 16, 2007

I am so sorry for your loss. My son Tre took his life almost three months ago. I understand your "fog" feelings. I will give you some advice that was given to me by other survivors of suicide. One said she set her alarm for earlier in the morning and would just wallow in her grief for a half hour or so. she would then force herself up, moving as if on auto pilot throughout the rest of the day (many people will understand your remote and quiet behavior) and then do it again in the evening. The other survivor told me she was advised to simply take her hands and physically move the feelings to the side. she said that worked after a few tries. I also don't know how I am functioning at this point. I do find that staying busy has helped me to change my focus for even a few moments. I do not have a job and at times would welcome one. Other times not. I know that I spend a lot of time talking to both my son and to God. I was also told to sit in front of a computer or a journal and write a letter to myself from my loved one. I add to letter each day. I knew my son's heart so well in so many ways that I often find I write things that are not my words and I have no recollection of writing. Please feel free to stay in touch with me. Kelly