I Couldn't Sleep Because I Felt As If Him Killing Himself Was My Fault.

I have a boyfriend, and his bestfriend is also my bestfriend's boyfriend, and her boyfriend has a sister in which I am quite close too.

We used to talk a lot about her relationships.
She was in a 6-year relationship and out of no-where, they broke up because things weren't working for him. She was heartbroken, and did some really stupid things - like getting into another relationship far too quickly.

I asked her many questions, we were both drinking together and she told me that she didn't love him, and she still loved her ex. I told her that maybe she should just tell him, she said she couldn't because she already tells him that she's in love with him.

A couple of months after I asked her whether they were happy, whether they had fallen in love yet, she said 'no, I don't love, and I don't think I ever will'.
That's when my bestfriend and I immediately told her that staying in a loveless relationship wasn't a good idea, she told us that she was aftraid to leave him because she feared he would kill himself.

We both told her to get out of the relationship, and that night, she did. I was shocked, but yeah happy for her, because now she could find someone and take the time for fall in love with him.

We found out two weeks later that her ex boyfriend now, killed himself. I was shocked, I was so angry with myself, I didn't know what to think. He gased himself in his car and he had the girl on the phone the whole time.

It really messed her up and I couldn't help to think I contributed.

RIP.

SimplySarah SimplySarah
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 10, 2007

I have never experienced this, but I send you my condolences. It's not you're fault at all. You only tried to do what was best. That's what matters.