I Fell In Love With A Friend

Hello I am 42 and married. January 6th I had a coiling procedure done on a brain aneurysm. Anyway My husbans and I have been friends with this person for many years. He is also married. Said he has been in love with me since 2002, I never thought of him more than a great friend. After my surgery, he told me hes has loved me for all this time. He never said nothing because of the friendship, left Texas. I never had any idea. He said something after the surgery, then we hugged. Since I have fallen in love, we have not had sex. Just talked and kissed. I am confused, I do know that I love him. I don't want to hurt anyone.Should I let my happiness go in favor of what is right. We have always shared a bond, just not physical. Now I find I think of him 24 hours a day, dream of him. He is the more rational one, we need to give it time. Has anyone experienced this?

spike2006 spike2006
41-45, F
1 Response Mar 6, 2010

I believe that the main problem lies in something your husband is not doing that this friend/new love now is. Find what he is fulfilling in your life that your husband isn't and try mentioning it to your husband. He also seems to be more of a "schoolgirl crush." Try to do more things with your husband that help you remember why you feel in love with him and that will take your mind of this other man. A relationship with this man would only lead to sadness for your husband and the friend's wife, and ultimately, for you and your friend. I had this same thing happen to a friend, and it really ruined things because she ended up realizing she was simply good friends with the guy she divorced her husband for. But by then it was too late. She was with another man she didn't love and 4 people's lives were messed up, not to mention their kids. I hope you can make the right decision on this. And know that there are always people there for you! =)