Hey Girls!

my mom used to sew dresses for the girls in church, and she would have me wear them and see if they looked right. as i write about this, it's almost weird to think that it actually happened; i've spent most of my life trying to get rid of those memories. 

i really enjoyed it. that's the truth. 

in junior high, i would sneak into my mother's closet and try on her evening gowns, wedding dress and try applying makeup. i would fill plastic baggies with water and stuff them into her bra. i felt sick and enthused at the same time. we've all been there.

i would go online and scower the web for people like myself: crossdressers, tgs, tvs, drag supply stores, online forums, sex change before and after sites... i looked at all this in horror, wondering where i fit into it all. 

it took me a long time to stop hating myself, and through it all, i think the biggest issue i had with myself is that i'm straight. in my quest for self i tried kissing guys, just to see if maybe i had it all wrong. i had little relief, though, when it did nothing for me. there i was: attracted to women, but forever plagued with the desire to wear dresses, put on heels, makeup and have a big pair of breasts. 

i enjoy being a man. that's the truth. 

i can only be truthful with myself and others. i'm telling more people now. slowly. i'm 21 in five days and i feel like i've only just started being the whole me. 

it's not something i have to do all the time, dressing up. i like it, but i think it'll be my halloween tradition, or maybe i'll use it to tell a story. to speak to people. 

create a drag persona and march my way across the globe in pumps of pride. 

18-21, M
1 Response Mar 4, 2010

People should do whatever makes them happy, I am so glad to see/ hear when people stop caring about social norms and finding what truly makes them feel alive. As long as one is not putting others in danger or oneself, then I believe we should fulfill our true ambitions. Good luck to you!