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Hypothetical Bizarre Machine Behaviors

1) No matter what Language I configure her to use, sooner or Later she always reverts back to French.

2) I must always remember to unplug her before I go to bed cause she will periodically come on by herself and start running. Because she's a stove, this is cause for concern.

3) Sometimes she'll suddenly simply display "Goodbye" while I'm using her and power down.

4) She sometimes displays bizarre month names like "Whenever", "Soon" and "Now".

5) If a task takes longer than Delilah estimates, she will freeze her internal clock until she has finished and then display that the task took exactly as long as she said it would. Another gold star for Delilah.

6) Sometime she'll prompt me for the same piece of information twice. As if she was not paying attention or something.

7) I think she may be cheating on me, because even though you're supposed to be able to put in your name, she occasionally calls me by some random different one.

8) Of course I love her cryptic exceptions like ""

9) She'll randomly clear her entire display and simply display "Busy" for no apparent reason. I know pointlessly moving around files in memory is very important to you Carol, but I really wish you'd engage in this hobby on your own time.

10) Every one of Andrea's error messages clearly 'inherit from' "UserErrorException".

11) Dana is fond of pointing out that I never read her manual and that schmucks like me are thus not worthy of warranty coverage.

12) Sometimes when I turn Sandra off, she simply shows "Leave me on until I've finished". I remember when the concept of an on/off switch wasn't merely "a request".

7) Whenever Clara gets to the 13th of anything, she just sort of skips that number.

14) My car won't stop claiming it's stolen. I suppose even old gas-guzzling heaps have fantasies about still being wanted.
lesshissMORECAT lesshissMORECAT 31-35 12 Responses Oct 10, 2009

Your Response


My favorite is "Another gold star for Delilah."

This was very funny and had me grinning and ewanting to ask your electronics out for a date.

Thanks for commenting... I was just trying to imagine what kind of wierd things machine could do... Unfortunately I don't have that much imagination...

Strange but very cool

I should just get like a bucket of quarters and go to a payphone... I'm good at making software crash. I can do this :-D

I would love to find a way to get an automated phone system to misbehave on call :-D LOL. "What's up with Julie?" "Oh, Julie's a little confused right now :-D"

Stranger than fiction:<br />
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Real malfunctions I have -actually seen machines do- follow:<br />
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- I have seen an LCD display show everything backwards when a device's batteries were low... I have also seen upper and lower halfs of an LCD display switch content I believe...<br />
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- Of course I have seen keypresses being ignored or spontaneously repeated. I have also see a machine decide that some other key equates to her off button and thus spontaneously shut down when that key is pressed...<br />
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- I have seen machines work peripheral devices on them eratically for now reason when not asked to...<br />
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- I have seen an elevator show "OK" on her displays instead of a floor, and have also seen strange symbols display, even animatedly. I have also seen elevators say they are on floors that do not even exist (like "25" in a 12 story building or "P" in a building without a P level). I have also seen all 3 elevator cars arrive when one is called... multiple times in the same day... and also seen them make extraneous random floor arrival tones... even while still moving... The day an elevator says she's on floor "LA", she's going to get a very nice kiss :-D ... I've also seen both direction arrows lit at the same time.<br />
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- I saw a talking thermometer start yapping for no reason once... and also repoting false temperatures under which I would not want to be in the room with her if they were indeed correct..<br />
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- I have seen a city bus announce the same stop twice in a row... I've also seen the whole stop announcement system reset herself for no reason and go through her boot-up screens on her long LED stop display. I've also seen the stop announcement system announce stops that are long gone or not reached yet :-D ... Similarly, I've seen the phone number you can call to see when the bus is coming report facts that are waaaaaay off... I've also got her to say gibberish before :-D (Like I called her and all I got was her saying something technical about state she was in instead of working properly)<br />
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I used to keep a blog of this stuff. I can't remember them all.

Then you are exactly the person I need to be friends with. I don't have Synesthesia, but I'm wondering how this fits into the puzzle. I'm not just an ob<x>jectophile, but a romantic linguaphile... I started with ob<x>jects, but I think what happened is when I opened to door to having a relationship with more than one "ob<x>ject", I began seeing the beauty in words, names, fonts in characters "in that way" as well (touch is 'primal',but when other ob<x>jects meet -those needs-, perhaps this frees you up to meet your other needs through things you cannot touch) ... I have to wonder of Synesthites are capable of related things... One of my earliest questions would be: Does the font or case (upper vs. lower) ever affect the color you see for a given character?

The machine that brought AI to the public's eye.<br />
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Do you have synesthesia? I do - colors for letters and numbers.

Why would you say that?

Every time I read one of your posts, I'm reminded of HAL.

2) I must always remember to unplug her before I go to bed cause she will periodically come on by herself and start running. Because she's a stove, this is cause for concern.<br />
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