Embracing His Inner Hyde Part Two

There's a new man in my life. I've not mentioned him to you before.  He is a thirty-six year old writer who calls himself D.W.P. - Dom With Pen.  He's got a wonderful tumblr that explores the D/s dynamic.  I was looking at some of the posts there when I saw one that reminded me of my lover.

My lover, for the record, is not thirty-six.  He's not in his forties, either.  He's in his mid-fifties, and he's been doing this stuff for a while.  Making women ***, I mean.  Dominating them, controlling them, talking dirty to them.  And he's very, very good at it.

He's offered me opportunities to ask him anything I want.  When someone does that, I freeze up.  I respond to that sort of statement the way professional comedians do when they're told "say something funny."  It ***** up our process when you put us on the spot that way.  Don't get me wrong; I ask plenty of questions in the course of conversation.  But when I'm told to do it on command, I can't.  I just can't.  It's not like having an ******, when, if he's told me "*** for Me, M" I find my **** spasming, legs squeezing together, unable to breathe properly.  Questioning can only happen when it develops naturally, after some conversation and laughter. Even then, I usually learn the things I want simply by listening to what people want to share with me.  It's how I roll.  I'm a great interrogator, but it doesn't involve me asking much of anything.  It's just attending to what the other person needs to say, what he's anxious to get off his chest, what he's eager to discuss.

So I was look at the Dom With Pen tumblr and I saw some imagery that reminded me of my lover and a question I asked him tonight after he made me ***.  The first was a black and white of a man in a suit whispering in a woman's ear.  Her eyes are closed, lips slightly parted.  The second was a shot of a nude couple, captioned Lost in Submission: Take Me From Behind.  She's kneeling on the edge of a leather sofa and he stands behind her, his arms around her, hands cupping her breasts.  She's reaching back behind her, behind him, to caress his behind and, presumably, to press him deeper into her.  Her eyes are closed too.  Her lips are slightly parted too.  And he's whispering in her ear.

If that was my lover and me, I know what he'd be whispering.  I want to rape your ***.  I know this because he told me so tonight.  "When I'm ******* you from behind," my lover said, "I will whisper to you 'I want to rape your ***.' I won't shout it.  I'll just whisper it."  I swooned a bit when he told me this.  I know that not all women would have this response.  Some would smack him or be outraged or get turned off.  Certainly many who have actually been raped, be it in the *** or elsewhere, would not find these words arousing. But I've led a sheltered life, one devoid of violence and pain, without any malicious force exerted against my body.  So I hear those six little words, "I want to rape your ***," and interpret them the way this man means them, as "I want to make sweet love to you with extreme passion in a part of your body that's been unexplored, a part that has lovely sensitive nerve endings which will feel wonderful to you as I penetrate and slide in and out."  Because I know that although he speaks of rape, he will make sure I am ready, relaxed, stretched a bit and well lubed.  But that sort of reassurance is not terribly sexy.  It makes it seem safe.  And while I want sex to be safe in certain ways, particularly in disease and injury-related matters, I want an element of danger, of being with a beast who's going to ravish me.

Does that make sense?

It's words, not deeds, that count in this instance.  My body won't be harmed - far from it - but my mind will be thoroughly ******, mercilessly used.  Then again, my lover's warned me that his ability to stay hard for a long time will result in "one very sore lil *****" so perhaps I'm a bit too blithe on the matter of physical wellbeing. 

But I'm willing to take the risk.
milkynips milkynips
46-50, F
2 Responses Jan 9, 2013

Yes, I am with you and want to be in you.

Most kind of you, but I've a lover who does not wish to share. :-D

Now that you mention it, it makes perfect sense.

Good ****.

Thanks, buddy. :-D

Don't mention it, sweetcheeks.