What's Your Definition Of A Dominant Woman?

I consider myself a very dominant woman. And I've always admired women who were dominant.  But I've never believed "dominant" and "*****" are synonymous, although they can certainly go hand-in-hand!  And being a ***** isn't always a bad thing.... I've always believed a dominant woman is an intelligent woman who knows herself and what she wants and, while she may be open to all sorts of life lessons, she makes her own decisions and doesn't let anyone else control her.  She isn't sexist; I feel like sexism from either side is fear-based and a dominant woman knows that there are horrible men out there, but "the enemy" isn't necessarily the one with the penis. A dominant woman knows that many other women are just as guilty of perpetuating double-standards and she doesn't buy into that. If she couldn't be an example to those women, she'd leave them to their limited world.  A dominant woman may be looking for love, but is also complete on her own. She knows what she wants and goes for it. She knows the word "*****" really stands for:
B- babe
I- in
T- total
C- control of
H- her life

Men shouldn't be afraid that a dominant woman automatically means she's going to bust his balls, and women need to stop worrying about what others think of them and realize dominant women are real women.  I enjoy being a very dominant, in-control woman and I seldom have problems with men. In fact, I have several friends and only one is a female. And, yes, she's dominant too!  Dominant women don't ghost-write; they get in there and write their own scripts.

"There are only two kinds of women: goddesses and doormats."  - Pablo Picasso

So what's your definition of a dominant woman?
CuteandTwisted CuteandTwisted
26-30, F
21 Responses Nov 1, 2010

My definition of a dominant woman is a woman who walks into a room and just takes charge. I love tat energy and authority

Usually when I get a punishment spanking there is no sex afterwards. But my wife recently was turned on by the welts from her thickest can left on my butt.. She demanded sex and usually she wants to ride me , but this time she took the bottom so she could count the welts using just her fingers...She was exploding with lust and gave me another caning afterwards... disgraziato

I have always found it strange that some men do not like or fear strong or dominant women.
Probably because such men are afraid of looking weak standing aside of such women.
I LOVE everything about a woman...even their faults. And I certainly am not intimidated by a strong woman...most likely because I am a large, in very good physical condition, emotionally, intellectually and emphatically developed Alpha Male.
Strong ,Intelligent or Dominant Women are women I seek out to be my equal...to be so is not easy but I enjoy the fun involved.


I agree with you,I am bi, my partner has been submissive to me since we met and I have the added joy of having an exgirl friend of his as my submissive, its really cool

Excellent. I love this.

I like this definition it is what I strive to be everyday, unfortunately I wasn't always this way but I have been burned by two relationships and have decided that I am in control and nobody is going to take my power away. I am a single mom who has fought with the state for almost 3 yrs for child support and still haven't seen a dime. And everyday im still searching for a way for my kids to get what they deserve. But as the old saying goes -if you want something done right you have to do it yourself-

close to your minus the men and the b-word,,,it could possible be our own personal definition.to me it also means being able to be a woman and not afraid to sweat and is most comfortable with hersrlf when she is in control.also taking on a leadership roll close to the men leaders family wise.

U want to dominate me?

a dominant woman is in control and know what she wants but with love and respect and will do no harm to anybody

Dear Mistress, simp;y put, A very strong Woman who can take any sub, female or male, an shape the dirt any way She wishes. i am on my knees crying, wishing we could meet..sissy-boy

she is the one in charge which is beautiful because she rules not the man. he is sibmissive to9her everywhim and he loves every inch of it and her because it should be hat way the women in charge rulling the male

i think a dominate women is one in total control of her submissive male and want nothng more then for him to obeyher every whim collar and walk him and he is totally in obiedience to her because he loves her and wants to submit to her because she rules.

hell i like the way you think a women wtih mate. but in control so deep she can even take another lover and her mate can say or do nothing aout it. now thats control. wow you would really have to be in cotrol to do some thing like that. if i met a women with that kind of power i would have to bow down and kiss her feet no matter were i was. id be in total aw of her power. it would really be my true pleasure to meet not just submitt a women of such true inner beauty.

Really couldn't say it better;<br />
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"I've always believed a dominant woman is an intelligent woman who knows herself and what she wants and, while she may be open to all sorts of life lessons, she makes her own decisions and doesn't let anyone else control her." <br />
<br />
I've always found a strong parallel between dominant women and intelligence.

I think a truly dominant woman is one that can get her sub to willingly and joyfully do any thing she wants.<br />
I know that sounds like common sense, and a very simplified answer.<br />
<br />
But think a sec. Every relationship is different. Going about this involves a number of different personalities both of the Domme and the Sub.<br />
Not all relationships are ba<x>sed on love.<br />
In some cases the Domme has no personal feelings for the sub except maybe contempt and desires nothing more than an outlet for venting their fruatration on to another, they truly want to dump their all their pent up hate and anger on to another and use this as a means of mental release.<br />
Some subs want just this they strive to be physically and emotionally abused and thrive on the loveless relationship. Knowwing their Domme has no feelings for them.<br />
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Others like me, thrive on the loving aspect of this type of relationship.<br />
When involved with another, they choose to give up themselves to their Mistress, this is done out of love and a desire to please and see their partner happy.<br />
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Personally I prefer a relationship ba<x>sed on love, mutual respect, kindness and understanding with a need to give the other what they need.<br />
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In my case when with a woman I am in love with, my pleasure comes from pleasing her, from fulfilling her wants and needs. <br />
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She can turn me on simply by asking for what she wants softly.... I would fall at her feet and beg to do more for her. <br />
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I think one of the biggest thrills comes when youfind some one you can confess your true desires to. You gain a certain psychological release and freedom when letting you feelings come to the surface.<br />
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Ex: You know I love you. I love you so much that I am going to open myself up to you and trust you with some of my deepest feelings.<br />
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I want nothing more than to see you happy. I want you to take charge of our relationship and of me.<br />
I will live only to serve you. I desire to surrender to you for the rest of my life giving myself only to you.<br />
I surrender my self to you, not only in the bedroom but in all aspects of our life.<br />
I surrender my free will to you and submit myself for the rest of our lives together.<br />
This is my desire, This is something I need. To submit to your controll and become your willing and happy slave.<br />
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I want you to trust me enough to show me and tell me of all your desires, to share them with me so I can serve them.<br />
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Spanking, g/s anal.<br />
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foot and *** worship<br />
begging to please her.<br />
some humiliation to please her.<br />
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She could get anything from me by asking.<br />
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I would love to hear the words slave come from her lips when addressing me.<br />
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I would love to hear her say she wants to pee in my mouth. spank me<br />
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order/allow me to worship her feet and ***.<br />
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As long as I know she loves me back. I will strive to make her the happiest wife, owner, mistress in the world. And NO she doesn't have to be ***** to get her way

She sounds like just one of my definitions of a dominant woman. I think dominant woman can the one in control, being taken control of, or sharing control, but the one element I see in dominant women is THEIR CHOICE to live as they please. They do what is right for them. Some dominant women like to give up the control, too. But the main thing is use to define them is personal choice. To be in control, not as a fear-ba<x>sed anger and revenge, but because they like the control, the one(s) they control want it, and because there is a mutual love and respect. Likewise, some dominant women want to relinquish the control, but it is not out of fear of self-reliance, it is their own choice given with love and respect to another who loves and respects them and would be taken back if they were no longer being respected and loved. Or they share power. But always, a dominant woman makes her own choices, not out of fear or hate or anger at the world or passivity or aggression, but because she feels that is what is right for her. She controls, shares power, or relinquishes control only of her own free will and only when there is mutual trust, love and respect. From your desc<x>ription, it sounds like your wife is just such a woman. Dominant because that's just who she is, and not out of a deep-seated anger. That's great. I really admire that and I admire your relationship. To me, there is no template for the perfect marriage or any healthy relationship. To me, the only requirements should be mutual love, respect, trust, communication and commonality. Awesome.

I can give You my Wife as example.<br />
She is strong, very strong (not phisically) and She control our life.<br />
Please, don't think, reading the word "control", that i'm a brainless puppet and that She make all the choices, even when i got to bathroom :)<br />
For control i mean that She see what is best and what not and then She tell me what prefer, working around my doubts until i see what She see.<br />
And sometimes this doesn't happen. <br />
But She is strong and dominant and confident, so She has no problem in admitting errors.<br />
She, thanks God!, simply is Herself, not caring about other thoughts or how She appear to them.<br />
And sometimes She refuges in me.<br />
I don't think this means she isn't "dominant" but simply that She IS dominant and don't fear anything, even Her fears (ok, sounds a bit confused, i know, but please, be patient, english isn't my language).<br />
In our sex life, lately She become more Mistress, embracing my fantasies.<br />
But we are always a couple and we act as it.

I've always admired a dominant woman, but not so much the women who are "dominant" out of defensiveness or anger, which is ultimately fear-ba<x>sed. Although I completely understand where that comes from and was once a doormat and an angry, fearful "dominant" woman.<br />
I believe dominant women stand up for themselves and do not abide disrespect, abuse or prejudice of any kind, but neither does she alienate others in her aggression or indiscriminately attack men simply because he is "the evil man with his evil penis". She allows no one, male or female, to hold her back, define her, rule her, control her. She knows she makes her own rules. Others can come along or not as they please. She knows when to rely on herself and when to ask for help. She always knows who she is, but is always growing and learning and evolving.

Lots of women are dominant but not sexually . Most prefer it that way most people would rather that be the others idea , I think , men and women . Not really a requirement of life a couple can be comfortable together without it even . Sexually dominant wasn't specified , sorry girls ! Oops ... That would be the initiator of intimacy . There are guys who really desire ultimate physical intimacy but somebody else initiated and dominant women heve learned how to share the blame and make it fun even liking control , or so I have read . In real life most women want a man not a slave . Oh , I am totally outed .

A dominant woman according to my fantasy is one that can be herself with all of her humility and grace and natural love , gentleness caring but has a mysterious understanding about it when somebody wants to serve her , and can enjoy , use control that energy . I think if the girl changed too much from who she is normally it could get phoney but any girls who could gracefully accept another <br />
wanting to serve her and use a servant to make her own life better , funner,but be true to herself is comfortably dominant and could keep a slave or slaves for life , For me it would be the girl I wanted to please and compliment , not a costume or a personna , but if she has the sexy grace to accept the ultimate compliment and can find her own satisfaction being served that is sweetly dominant .

Great story. A dominant woman is one who knows exactly what she wants. She is the head of the household and makes sure her SO knows his/her place is to serve her wants, desires and visions. Any infractions are dealt with the appropriate discipline and correction. She controls everything about her household and if she decides whe would like to flirt or even take another lover that is her perogative. She makes the rules for the household and it is her perogative to interpret them how she sees fit and even change or add to them as is her whim. I like the way you think. I would love to hear more about your ideas.