My First Ballbusting
i have been serving my Mistress (The Goth Widow) for nearly a year now, not continuously, but from time to time we have evening or 24 hours "scenes". In that time, She has become a better Mistress, getting more dominant, more demanding, and more cruel. Her punishments have progressed from using a play whip to a tawse, cane and riding crop (a real horse one, not a play one). i enjoy being punished by Her, the misdemeanours so petty in real-life terms, but important when serving a Mistress to Her rules (like not looking directly into Her eyes, like serving a meal EXACTLY the way She specifies, only speaking when spoken to etc.).
This Christmas i bought her a new a whip - a 33" snake whip. She actually enjoys punishing me now (which She didn't do to begin with) and this whip has heightened Her excitement and enjoyment giving punishment - matching mine receiving it. In a scene since then i was due 32 lashes as punishment for various misdemeanours - She gave me 20 with the whip but wanted a break and released me from my bonds. Realising She was up for almost anything, i begged her for something She had not had the courage to do before - ballbusting. i showed her a video and She saw the potential for it. Wearing Her kinky pointed boots, She gave me ten hard kicks in the balls. Some did not connect too well, but those that did directly caused excrutiating pain which in a perverse way i enjoyed - She was clearly enjoying it too. It also made me realise that in giving my Mistress more opportunities to be cruel to me was making the femdom relationship even better. Once i fell to the ground, and She lashed me 3 times with the whip ordering me to get up and "take it". For the last two, i requested that She kneed me, wanting to try this too.
With a cruel grin on Her face She asked, "Is this is what you want?". i nodded. Suddenly, She brought her knee up into my groin. It hurt more than anything She had done to me before, and i doubled over, groaning: She laughed cruelly. i managed to bring myself upright to allow Her to give me a second one, which She did with more force, laughing as she did it. i collapsed to the ground in agony, clutching my balls. She lashed me, really hard with the whip, 3 more times, finally throwing it at me, leaving me with the words, "You pathetic little wimp, call yourself a man."
After that, i was the most submissive, obedient and respectful slave that i had ever been, pleasing my Mistress so much She allowed me to pleasure Her clitoris and nipples to give Her an ****** later, caning my back whenever i hurt her or failed to find the spot.
Bliss is a cruel and demanding Mistress, believe me.
i want her to be even crueller to me too. At the moment, when She has nothing for me to do my Mistress kindly allows me to amuse myself on my computer - a real slave would not be allowed such luxury, he would be chained back up in the dungeon. While we do not have a dungeon (or chains) there are plenty of things She could tie me to with ropes or handcuffs, and leave me there thinking of how better to serve Her.
What do you think? Am i a fool to have my Mistress treat me this way, or is it an essential part of my training?