And A Side Of Alone
I have been single for two years but in reality for about ten. I have raised my son who is now eleven his whole life even when his mother and i were together i was the one lookin out for him. The past couple years all I have did or done has been for him. He doesent go to his mothers much anymore and when he does he wants to come home, so i do what i have to for him. im not complaining and i wouldn't change it if I could. im just alone lol. i can't live unless I live for him. I have dated a couple people but he is always on my mind and the ones i have tried to date , well it didn last long. either they had a problem with the attention I give him or I found something wrong not really with them, but that they wasn"t who I wanted around him. I have never felt so alone in my life. I dont think my little story here is as bad a problem as others. I know there are people who would prob trade me my problems for theirs right now, but i guess you cant measure lonelyness, it has a different meaning and feeling to us all. For me its just a dark place. You look around and see people with their significant other and as a family doing things and it brings you down. My son wants me to find a woman and I quote," Dad go find a woman" lol.but i cant just pull one out of the air. He is the only light i have in this world and i try to give him what he needs but i cant give him a family. The thing I dont get is 46% of the united states is single. and all of us that suffer from being lonely but yet none of us can find each other. I read on here someone said it felt like breaking from the inside out and I think thats the best way i could put it to. Well i guess i kinda rambled on now that i see what i wrote and guess i didn't really make a point. Its not much but I have never really told anyone how i feel let alone people i dont know so i guess its a good start.