Life Lessons Learned From Horror Movies.

This is a little long, I know. lol

When most people settle down in front of the TV with a bowl of popcorn and a scary movie, they are expecting some thrills and chills, plus maybe a higher electricity bill after keeping the lights on all night. Not many people are hoping to learn important life lessons from ghost stories or gory thrillers. But with the right point of view, horror movies can offer some surprisingly helpful life advice. Even if the advice is not too practical, at least it offers a few laughs to help during those sleepless nights following a terrifying film.

1. Never investigate strange noises. It happens all the time in horror movies: the protagonist knows that something weird is happening lately. Maybe there have been unexplained murders or strange sightings in the neighborhood. All the same, when she hears an ominous bump downstairs, nothing stops her from walking unarmed into the dark living room. The lesson here is that nobody should ever check out a suspicious noise without bringing along a burly friend or, better yet, calling the police first. Even staying put seems like a better option than exploring. Of course, if characters stopped investigating weird noises, most horror movies would no longer exist.

2. Wear lots of clothing. Since wearing swimsuits makes people into targets for ghosts and other spooks, it might be wise to stick to cardigans and sensible jeans. It is also a wise idea to wear shoes that are good for running, even when heading out on a road trip or to a formal dinner. People in horror movies never know when the need for running will arise.

Stay away from scary-looking places. As a general rule, if a place looks creepy, frightening or ominous, it probably is. Places like abandoned mental hospitals, ancient church graveyards, Victorian mansions and dark, dismal forests are usually scary-looking for a reason. Whenever possible, people should avoid visiting places that look like hideouts for vengeful ghosts and serial killers. Horror movies rarely take place at playgrounds or libraries, which should be a good lesson when it comes to avoiding ghouls.

4. Stick together. Whenever anyone in a horror movie says, "I'll be right back," he or she is basically saying, "I'll never come back." The buddy system is especially important when the group is being stalked by a deranged killer. Whether someone is heading off to find help after an emergency or just to get another soda from the cooler, there is always strength in numbers when it comes to fighting supernatural
predators.

5. Teenagers should try to be as unpopular as possible. In real life, happy, confident teenagers are at the top of the food chain. In horror movies, being popular is a kiss of death. Popular teens usually die before the opening credits even roll. The more a couple loves each other, the more likely they are to die at Lover's Lane or in a summer camp cabin. Being a cheerleader or football captain also proves fatal. The smart, shy teenagers might not get dates to the winter dance, but at least they manage to be the last ones standing when their whole graduating class has been wiped out by a zombie hoard.



6. Be very careful when buying a new home. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. Homeowners should ask the real estate agent why they are able to buy the house for only half the usual price. It is always a smart idea to ask the real estate agent about the house's history. If it turns out that something horrible happened in 1966, this is probably more important than the parquet floors or picture windows. Plus, location is everything. If a house was built on any type of cemetery or burial site, the cost of hiring exorcists will make it a very bad investment.

7. Always take kids' drawings very seriously. Most of the time, when little kids sit down with crayons and a sheet of paper, adults can expect adorable pictures of flowers, kittens and smiling stick figures. In a horror movie, those innocent drawings turn very sinister. Movies such as "The Ring" and "Insidious" feature kids' drawings that make the viewers do double-takes. Instead of just taping crayon masterpieces to the fridge, parents, teachers and babysitters should take the time to really look at children's drawings. If the kids are drawing ghouls, goblins and other things that go bump in the night, it might be time to call the local ghost hunters.
laurie37 laurie37
18-21, F
1 Response May 21, 2012

ya I know. I love horror movies myself. I love how in some horror movies where the kill is ironic.