The Taser, By Dr. Philbilly

Several years ago, right after Hurricane Katrina, my wife Melissa was driving back and forth working at the center that was giving out food and water. Sometimes she was driving after dark and the reports of looting were starting to come in. It was kind of a dangerous situation so I decided to buy her some protection. I went down to see a friend of mine, let’s call him Shane Barnes, at Sportsman Gun and Pawn. Shane sold me one of the coolest things, a taser gun. So, I get home, sit in my recliner and start checking it out. Then I thought to myself, “How can I send my wife out into this cruel world with something that I don’t even know if it works or not?”

Then I remember this story that I read on the internet about this guy who tased himself. Hmmmmm…should I or shouldn’t I? Why not? The other guy lived to write about it. It can’t be that bad. Can it? So I set the taser to level 1, take a deep breath and ever so lightly touch my leg. The last thing I remember was gently pulling the trigger.

As I woke up I’m lying on my back, looking up at the ceiling fan and wondering, "how in the heck did my hat get up there?" Then I had another thought. The dang thing works alright but who was that little girl I heard screaming? Was that me? What’s that I smell burning? I crawl back into my chair and put the taser away, fully satisfied that it does work. My wife comes home a little later and I show her what I had bought for her. She says “Does it work?” I looked her straight in the face and said with the most sincere voice that I could. “How in the heck am I suppose to know? I‘m sure Shane wouldn‘t have sold it to me if it didn‘t work.” Then I limped off to my room to lie down with full knowledge that Melissa would be safe and sound.
DrPhilbilly DrPhilbilly
9 Responses Jul 28, 2010

Ha! Well it won't be happening again thats for sure lol.

hahaha! Thats me lol :) would have killed our little dog. Then my wife woulda killed me lol. I'm the geinnea pig for life lol

Thank you. You wanted to add "Not to bright tho" at the end of that didnt you? lol

Wonderful personality!!! :)

Well, hmmmm! We do have a great time but ummmm, u see? Well...Sometimes she don'y find it funny until the shock wears off lol. But I on the other hand think its hilarious right away lmao!!!! :)

:D<br />
haha, God that's so funny!! Your wife must have such a good time with you! That’s great and it's very important! Congrats to you for that!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I still have the occassional uncontrolable jerk and tick from it lol. What was I thinking? :)

Very sweet story, and extremely funny!!!!!!!! i laughed so much!!!!!!!!<br />
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!