Always Be Prepared.........................

Jane gets lost from the rest of her party as they trudge through the Jungle. She walked and walked for what seemed an eternity when suddenly she heard a spine chilling yodel coming from the tree tops. On looking up she sees Tarzan in his full naked glory swinging from vine to vine. Tarzan spots Jane and swings over and down towards her. His toned body glistening in the sun rays as he passes through them. He lands on the ground acrobatically and proceeds to look Jane up and down inquisitively, Jane meantime feasting her eyes on Tarzan’s Adonis figure.
“ME TARZAN KING OF ALL JUNGLE”
 Tarzan announced with great pride.
“Nice to meet you Tarzan I am Jane from England”
Tarzan Grunted and started feeling Jane’s clothes with curiosity as he looked Jane up and down until his stare came onto Jane’s chest, he stopped and looked perplexed and stared at his own chest rubbing his flat hand over his solid pectoral muscles and then looking at Jane’s chest. He moved his hand over and gently squeezed Jane’s chest – Jane taken aback Brushed Tarzan’s hand away – Tarzan looked confused and looked back onto his own chest and again went to squeeze Jane’s , Jane pushed his hand away, and said “Stop it” Tarzan stared back with a sorrowful confused look in his eyes. Jane realising Tarzan was naïve and not doing this with any lecturous intent felt a naughty feeling come over her. “What’s wrong Tarzan ? Have you never seen a woman before?” Asks Jane – looking at his bronzed rippled body with a growing degree of hornyness. “WOMAN” Tarzan sputters back obviously never having used the word before. “Yes woman like me” Jane went on as Tarzan looked on impressed by this new specimen in front of him Tarzan replied “NO Tarzan no see woman before”
After a brief exchange Jane asked Tarzan “So what does Tarzan do for sex” – giving and explanation of what sex was – Tarzan beamed a great big smile “ TARZAN HAS TREE”. Jane confused retorted “TREE?” Still beaming Tarzan replied “YES TARZAN HAS TREE” as he was so obviously proud of his tree he the said “DOES Jane want to see Tarzan’s Tree?” “YOU HAD BETTER BELIEVE IT” blurted back Jane.
Tarzan scooped Jane up in his arm and slung her on his back then swung effortlessly through the trees fro hundreds of metres until he came across a clearing at which point he descended to the forest floor. On arriving at ground level Jane stood up and looked around for a minute before Tarzan came back into her line of sight – grinning inanely and pointing to a very large tree in the middle of the clearing announcing “Tarzan’s Tree”. Jane on looking at the tree could see a strategically located and very well worn hole in direct line of Tarzan’s pointing finger.
 Jane seizing the opportunity of being away from her parents and the remainder of her party and being alone with this magnificent specimen decided to take the lead “Yes Tarzan Jane is WOMAN – and has a nice soft juicy hole in her – would Tarzan like to see Jane’s hole” Tarzan looked a little confused but nodded his head in agreement. Jane hitched up her safari skirt above her waist and pulled off her underpants and stood while Tarzan looked her up and down demonstrating his approval in the way a man usually does. “Would Tarzan like to try Jane’s hole?” Jane said with a wicked smile on her face. Tarzan nodded so feverishly that Jane thought his head might come off. Jane lay on the ground and open her legs wide waiting to receive this magnificent piece of manhood – closing her eyes in anticipation of the divine experience she was about to receive when suddenly she felt the most intense pain coming from her groin and as her eyes opened she could see Tarzan pulling his leg back after obviously having kicked her between her legs. When Jane managed to get her breath back she burst out “WHAT THE F&CK DID YOU DO THAT FOR!”
Tarzan looked back at Jane with a wise look in his eye and winked and tapped the side of his nose with his finger as he replied
“Tarzan just checking for squirrels”
ReasonableAnswer ReasonableAnswer
51-55, M
3 Responses Sep 3, 2011

hahahahahahaha

LMAO!!

I take it they were after his nuts?

lol