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Sad But Funny, True Computer Stories!
A personal story in the experience: I Love Jokes And Riddles
Apr 12th, 2008
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True Tech Support Stories
Think you're computer-illiterate? Check out the
following excerpts from a Wall Street Journal article by Jim Carlton.
Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls
asking where the "Any" key is.
mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover
turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
complaining that the system wouldn't read word processing
files from his old diskettes. After trouble- shooting for
magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was
found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled
them into the typewriter to type the labels.
defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the
customer along with Xeroxed copies of the floppies.
floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer
asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone
down, getting up and crossing the room to close the door to
his room.
computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of
trouble-shooting, the technician discovered the man was
trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the
monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
program, so a Dell tech suggested he go to the local
Egghead. "Yeah, I got me a couple of friends, "the customer
replied. When told Egghead was a software store, the man
said, "Oh, I thought you meant for me to find a couple of
geeks."
keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up
his tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a
day, then removing all the keys and washing them
individually.
enraged because his computer had told him he was "bad and
an invalid". The tech explained that the computer's "bad
command" and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken
personally.
couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring
the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what
happened when she pushed the power button. Her response,
"I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing
happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's
mouse.
brand-new computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked
the unit, plugged it in, and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for
something to happen. When asked what happened when she
pressed the power switch, she asked "What power switch?"
every time he logs in. It turned out he was typing his user name and
password in capital letters.
Tech Support: "OK, let's try once more, but use lower-case letters."
Customer: "Uh, I only have capital letters on my keyboard."
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within
my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, It's
because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional,
at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it
have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything
about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it." At this point the
Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn't stand
it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM
drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive!
A good friend of mine in Los Angeles is somewhat computer illiterate.
She recently called me here (Italy) with a problem she was having with
her new computer:
"Simon, something's wrong with the Internet thing, it doesn't work."
"What does the computer say?"
"Well, it just told me that the program had performed an 'illegal
operation' and that it was going to be shut down."
I paused, about to respond that it was nothing to worry about and all
she had to do was restart the computer, when I thought of something.
"You think it means the police are going to come and shut down your
computer, don't you?"
A trans-Atlantic pause....
"Umm, it doesn't then?"
"No!"
My own story is;
One of my mums friend got her first computer recently, she told my mum that her mouse wasn't working, my mum relised that her friend was trying to use it as a remote control, as in , pointing it at the computer and clicking!
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| Comment on this Story | |
 Feeling hot  | Posted Apr 12th, 2008 at 7:36AM Now you know why we have codes like: PEBKB&F (problem exists between keyboard & floor) RTFM (read the flamin manual) and UE (user error)   |
 | Posted Apr 14th, 2008 at 8:16AM Talk about some dipshits in this world . . . |
 | Posted Apr 19th, 2008 at 3:25AM Thank goodness there are such dimwits in this world, they give me such a good laugh! Seriously though people like that are beyond belief, how can they be so dumb!!!! |
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