Anger Managment

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered, saying 'Hello.'I politely said, 'This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?'Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear 'Get the right f***ing number!' and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.

When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled 'You're an *******!' and hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word '*******' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, 'You're an *******!' It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic '*******' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, 'Hi,this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?'He yelled 'NO!' and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an *******!' and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking Spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a 'For Sale' sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the first ******* (I had is number on speed dial,) I thought that I'd better call the BMW *******, too.

I said, 'Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?'He said, 'Yes, it is.' I asked, 'Can you tell me where I can see it?' He said, 'Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax. It's a yellow ranch, and the car's parked right out in front.'

I asked, 'What's your name?' He said, 'My name is Don Hansen,' I asked, 'When's a good time to catch you, Don?' He said, 'I'm home every evening after five.'

I said, 'Listen, Don, can I tell you something?'

He said, 'Yes?'

I said, 'Don, you're an *******!'

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two ******** to call.

Then I came up with an idea. I called ******* #1. He said, 'Hello.' I said, 'You're an *******!' (But I didn't hang up.) He asked, 'Are you still there?' I said, 'Yeah,' He screamed, 'Stop calling me,' I said, 'Make me,' He asked, 'Who are you?' I said, 'My name is Don Hansen.' He said, 'Yeah? Where do you live?' I said, '*******, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, a yellow ranch, I have a black Beamer parked in front.' He said, 'I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers.' I said, 'Yeah, like I'm really scared, *******,' and hung up.

Then I called ******* #2. He said, 'Hello?' I said, 'Hello, *******,' He yelled, 'If I ever find out who you are...' I said, 'You'll what?' He exclaimed, 'I'll kick your ***,' I answered, 'Well, *******, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now.'

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd. in Fairfax.

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax. I got there just in time to watch two ******** beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.

NOW I feel much better. Anger management really does work.
TheOneyouwerewarnedabout TheOneyouwerewarnedabout
32 Responses Aug 27, 2012

reminds me not to get on your bad side , lol

It's a repost. I found that somewhere Nd posted it s a joke 👍😃

i know , i read it before on here

Thats anger management with a kick of karma, I love it:)


I love it! What a great idea!

Absolutely priceless!


I would do that if I have ******* numbers to call so every time I get mad I just had to dial the number and then scream "You *******!"

Or maybe I can do it with the number that always calls me looking for a branson. Or something like that.

OoOoO.... some one can make a short movie on this script.....this was amazing :)

Boy, are you a real nasty:))))


I've already got three numbers ready to go. Perhaps I should publish them on here and we could all call throughout the day. Different nationalities calling these people ********. They would be so confused. Lmao. I'm adding you to my circle. ;-)

This has just made my day. Lmfao

Thats some really good ******* **** right there :)


Really enjoyed this one, thank you for sharing....must try it to see if it works over my way ;)

That was the most **** up yet funniest **** I've ever read. I almost pissed my pants I was laughing so hard.!

Thats frickin hillarious! Please be my friend


Good stuff! Lmao and for the 3 minutes of amusement I thank you :)

Thanks for making my night! I don't even care if it's true or not, that was a great story :) thanks for posting

anytime.. ;)

lol that is wicked

LOL!! I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I read this story a while back, you're brilliant.

yar. i can't take credit... all i do is share/post things that i find funny ;)

ahhhh, thanks for sharing.

I've heard this one before XD

LOL...nice story...=)

LOL... absolutely bloody fantastic...

lol love this story :D

Cool story bro! *thumbs up*

Great example of the brain finding a solution and keeping the body safe.

I am impressed with the determination, never give attitude & most of all the sheer pleasure & glee in making things happen. I am green with envy but salute in admiration.

What a great story. Glad it didn't go wrong for you!

LOL I cant breathe!!!!!!!!!!!