I Love Jokes And Riddles

Walmart Shopper

By: ronanp

Written on September 23rd, 2012

After landing my new job as a Walmart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day ...... About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, decidedly unattractive, woman walked into the store along with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said, pleasantly, "Good morning and welcome to Walmart."
I then said, "Nice children you have there. Are they twins?" The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Don't be ******* stupid. Of course they aren't twins. The oldest one is 9 and the other one is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind or just stupid?"

I replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Madam. I just couldn't believe someone ****** you twice.

Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Walmart."

My Supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.

By: ronanp

Age: 51-55 , Male

3,184 people have read this story

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203 responses

jaymi999

Made my day!

May 10
1 like
Jessicaluyt

Hehehehe nice comeback

Apr 28
1 like
ronanp

Thanks sweetgirl

Apr 28
1 like
jssp

LOL!!!!! Couldn't stop laughing

Apr 27
2 likes
reallysweetgirl

LMAO ! That was good !

Apr 27
2 likes
marriedup

Still laughing.

Apr 27
2 likes
PrivateLegit

Too funny...Hahaha

Apr 8
1 like
47luckystars

I like it

Apr 8
1 like
Keith46

hehehe see all kinds at wally world.

Mar 23
1 like
esterbunny

;-)

Feb 2
1 like
Brandy1000

Everyone is right on this. Quick and funny answeared. She must have walked puzzled. Was it two different men? Did I really **** twice?

Jan 18
1 like
- ronanp
  My god ... It was you....
  
  Jan 19
  1 like
- Brandy1000
  Those were the questions she asked herself. So confused. Ha,ha
  
  Jan 19
  1 like
gaemgyu

this was on 9gag you reposter

Jan 1
1 like
- ronanp
  No man ... I made up myself ....
  
  Jan 1
  1 like
golden10

Lolz

Dec 15, 2012
1 like
theirfeet

Funnnnny....

Dec 2, 2012
1 like
BrideofKain

Did it really happened? If so then I wish I could think on my feet like that.

Oct 29, 2012
1 like
Eymber1597

I loved that!!! Sounds like walter from Jeff Dunham

Oct 22, 2012
1 like
tsele

pretty funny! XD

Oct 16, 2012
1 like
- tsele
  i meant... pretty haha
  
  Oct 16, 2012
  1 like
wheretheskymeetsthesea

Your joke is funny and your responses are too. Atta boy.

Oct 14, 2012
2 likes
- ronanp
  Just doin my job, sea....
  
  Oct 15, 2012
  1 like
CrazeJ12

If your supervisor was a coolcat he would have said "way to go!"

Oct 13, 2012
1 like
- ronanp
  he was a putz
  
  Oct 13, 2012
  1 like
tawande

Thatwas fun!

Oct 13, 2012
1 like
Elzhivago

...four thumbs up....

Oct 5, 2012
1 like
- ronanp
  whose other thumbs?
  
  Oct 5, 2012
  1 like
- tsele
  mine! hahaha! XD
  
  Oct 16, 2012
  1 like
- tsele
  looking for 2 more thumbs. hehehe
  
  Oct 16, 2012
  1 like
Jerry476

Well Done :))

Oct 1, 2012
1 like
kokopebblez

As many times as I have gone to Walmart.... At the wrong one at the wrong time. Hilarious. =)

Sep 30, 2012
2 likes
- kokopebblez
  Wish you were the greeter at my Walmart.
  
  Sep 30, 2012
  1 like
- ronanp
  I'm at the one odd the freeway, north of the city
  
  Oct 1, 2012
  1 like
Plato5v

I did enjoy that.

Sep 30, 2012
1 like
positiveenergy73

LOL awesome! If I had witnessed this conversation, I would have asked your manager to give you a raise on your first day=)

Sep 30, 2012
3 likes
- ronanp
  It's not too late, still outta work
  
  Oct 1, 2012
  1 like
AmbiguousEntity

Just... LOL! xD You're awesome

Sep 30, 2012
2 likes
josilver

The others have said it all. Great!

Sep 30, 2012
1 like
Ihatemeyouhateme

Lol great answer! Stupid person shouldn't have fired him

Sep 30, 2012
2 likes
tac3004

That was an awesome answer -- such a shame you lost your job over that I think they should have banded her from the store instead. LOL BTW - 51-55 years old is not senior, you are still young and your dreams can still come true. Don't give up hope, look at the brighter side of things. I loved your story. I will remember that one if I ever work in customer service again.

Sep 30, 2012
2 likes
- ronanp
  That's true, I can still get it up
  
  Oct 1, 2012
  1 like
- tac3004
  WOW - you are a tiger aren't you?
  
  Oct 1, 2012
  1 like
mpde

LOL LOL

Sep 30, 2012
1 like

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I Love Jokes And Riddles

Walmart Shopper

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