And This Is A Good One.

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long robe. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use wash cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone......

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Rinse off. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long robe and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, and light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.


Author Unknown.
Serenitree Serenitree
70+, F
7 Responses Dec 25, 2012

*Sighs* I actually miss having a wiener wagged at me. How sad is that!

Ah, sweetie....I can give you the names of a few on here who would love to wag their weenies for you. I got one yesterday. I blocked him of course, but I'll unblock him long enough to aim him in your direction, if you like.

LMAO! I was thinking more along the lines of a very specific member!

Well, now I'm jealous.

Yes : I like reading confessions and stories find people's writings fascinating .. Lol

Thanks looking forward to reading the rest now .. Have a great day ok :-) x.

You have time to read? I'm so busy answering questions, that I rarely think to see what people are writing. When I first started on EP, I made a minimum of 20 story comments a day, now I make maybe 10 a week.

Great story :-) x

It made me laugh when I read it, so I wanted to share.

haha!! thanks for sharing, had a laugh tonight. :D

Thank you for reading and commenting.

Thanks for the laugh

You got a weeny wagger in YOUR home? LOL

Lol...Thats just what I needed.

I'm glad you got a smile from it. Feel free to share.