For The Love Of Kurt

What is it though that draws so many of us to him?

I've loved him for eight years now. I feel such a deep feeling towards him. They say that you cannot love someone that you've never met, but then what is it then? It's his looks yes, but there's more to it. I love who he was, or at least who he seemed to be. I think of him so often, his home is in my mind. Thoughts of him are so routine and common place, I'm used to his name and face being the first thing in my mind when I wake up. I feel protective over him, I feel care and nurturing and intense love towards him. He brings tears to my eyes if I really think hard about him. I believe that he was killed, too, so that kinda adds to it. I think of him as a victim and as a soul-mate, that I would love to save and take care of and love. I don't really know how or why this happened either. I mean, I'm a pretty functional person, aside from general INFP-ish-ness. This is kind of a secret thing that I'm not exactly keen on talking about with other people. Sometimes my best friend brings it up and I actually get very nervous and embarrassed. It has become so deep and so ingrained it's hard to even explain properly. I could never actually speak it, and it's hard to write down; it's so embarrassing. I don't see this ever leaving me either. There's really no reason for it to, it doesn't really intrude upon my day to day life, but it's kind of difficult and heart-wrenching. It's like a "safe" love. He's the only celebrity that I've ever been infatuated with, and I've never felt such a deep love towards anyone before (I thought I loved my significant other, but that has faded). So yeah, that's that. I just felt the need to share this on this particular day for some reason.

Kurtface Kurtface
18-21, F
Dec 9, 2012