Why Do People Fall For Their Cousins?

Well I'm just wondering to myself, what wakes us 'love our cousins'???? Not all of us even like our cousin obviously because there is group called -I hate my cousin- and -I was molested by my cousin- *Shudders*
Well, I don't really like talking to some of my cousins because they think they're better and all that **** , yeah you know.......
But I'm also one of these people who get along with their cousins (some) SO well that they can be best friends.
Some of us here say that it's like they're 'created for each other' and that their cousin is their 'soul mate' and stuff like that......now, I can't judge these people or say they're crazy because first of all, I'm not in love with my cousin so I don't know how they feel like and secondly, I'm not against the cousins falling in love think!!! Although, I wonder what I would do If one of my children fell in love with their cousin......Errrr can't imagine the situation.....
The thing that's a bit strange when cousins get married is that the bride's mother is the groom's auntie And mother in law. So basically members of the family would have 2 or more titles.

I think that the reason that people might be attracted to their cousins is because you share the same blood so they look a bit like you (1st cousins share about 12% of the same blood). and they remind you of yourself and since you like yourself, you like your cousin too.
(Okay this one was a really silly one)
Back to all seriousness,

Your grandparents raised both your parent and theirs. A lot of people raise their children very much like their parents raised them. So you have both experienced very similar things in your child hoods and thus have many of the same philosophies and interests. You are naturally inclined to be kind to each other by the nature of your family relationship, as well, and it could be very hard not to fall for someone of the opposite sex and similar age when they consistently offer up acts of generosity and kindness.

When in a relationship with your cousin, there aren't much secrets and you already know each other and have that deep connection and therefore saves you the time of getting to 'know' each other through that dating process....
Also, There are less chances of nasty surprises/habits.

Lastly, people are attracted to taboo things and 'apparently',It's exciting to break the rules. Why do you think the ban on alcohol failed so miserably in the U.S.?
PrivatePirate PrivatePirate
13-15, F
9 Responses Jan 22, 2012

I HATE THIS!!!! I am in love with my cousin! And I don't mean a crush, I mean I am desperately and mentally in love with her, I was having a bad life, and she took me in and gave me a home, she saved my life, if it wasn't for her I would be dead, she is the greatest person I know, she has the biggest heart in the world a great mother, and trying to be a good wife to her husband who treats her like a ******* slave instead of his beautiful wife, when he treats her bad it hurts me so bad, I wish I could tell her how I feel but I can't, partially because of my own insecurities and the thought of me telling her might disgust her and make her hate me, I cry a lot because of this I wish I could walk up to her wrap my arms around her and tell her how much I love and desire to be her everything next to the children, I wish I could hold her and kiss her and make love to her anytime she wanted I would be a slave for her, I love her so much and I will never be with another woman cause I can't have her I feel jealous when she's on her phone texting someone that isn't her husband I think she's cheating on him but I can't say for sure but all I think about is "god why can't she with me?, why can't I give her the love and passion she deserves? Why??" I think some times I might have had less heartache if I killed myself instead of taking her offer to move with them.... I'm sorry everyone, please forgive my comment I really needed to tell someone I'm crying right now, my heart hurts so bad, I wish someone would fall in love with me for onceđź’”

Hi I can't say thing's will be alright because I don't know for sure. Listen.. my cousin just recently expressed to me that he has had feelings for me recently. I didn't know how to take it. I didn't blow up on him.. it was shocking. I did feel a bit awkward. However we are human. I love him dearly we saw each other grow as children.. As a adult I wanted his life to be as joyful as mine. I married had children. He has really crap relationships.. which makes me say ehhck... I know we will never be together.couple Wise.
He has expressed wanting to be intimate with me.. I just will say to you what I told him because he to has expressed me making it so his life feel more fulfilling. Love your self first. Love will eventually come. Sounds as if you have depression. Pray over it. One thing I told my cousin is yes it's very taboo but the Lord knows all. He knows that there was no Ill intentions behind him expressing himself. Take care. Hopefully my comment brings you some peace

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I would just like to say, as a person who has strong feelings for my cousin, is that this whole thing just seems to belittle my emotions. Not saying that what you are saying is wrong, however, to insinuate that we only feel the way we do about each other is because of the few genes we share.... It's hurtful. Will I, then also fall in love with a banana, sheep, or chimpanzee, because only a little portion of our genetic make-up, actually determines the sort of things that makes us "who we are".
I just feel like you are trying to sum up something into a very small package that can have a lot of differing reasons. I was several states away from my cousin, and we didn't even really know each other when we finally met again. We HAD to get to know each other... Our knowledge of each other equated to what one usually knows about a friend of a friend. You might have heard of one another, but not enough to have some "deep" connection. He is from my father's side of the family, I was raised by my mother. In fact, I was raised practically by my sister. Me and my cousin are vastly different in ideals and beliefs. What we have in common, we like the same television shows, and both like knives and swords. I can see where you are going, and I don't think you are completely wrong, but if you can barely understand or fathom it, why are you trying to say you know why?

Also, my biggest pain, is that it is considered taboo. I hate it, I wish I could change how I feel sometimes. It doesn't make it "More exciting" in any way. It often makes me feel awful. So... Please, if you don't mind, try not spread this idea around that it's some strange genetic or childhood connection... At least for me, it isn't true. Yeah it was easier to get to know each other because we are cousins, but that's not what made me like him, it's what makes me want to run away.

Many argue that relations with close families would produce children with a high chance of mental retardation, genetic variance,( hemophelia), or simply sever sickness because the genetic shuffle does not provide parallelling alleles to produce survival traits. When infatuated with ones cousin we feel as physically and mentally attracted to these people but biologically cousins can also be fit. remember our human population boomed recently so think if the ancient egyptians, chinese, or europeans. They intermarried simply because population density did not exist. Today many often prefer cross race marriage simply because it is different and they want to expand away from their genes to have a healthy variance for their children to wrk with in the genetic shuffle. When cousins have deep interest in one another it seems it is due to proximity and family values. It seems match made, that is if u are practically thrown on each other and simply leave together. But Humans in my opinion are a loving race and true love does not exist in our plain of existence. Love comes about when you and someone of the gender you feel attracted to come together and live through experiences with eachother, good or bad.

I love this post because it shows you how the society is nowhere close to perfect, but it is right in a sense of manner, but not developed into etik and moral.<br />
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Loving a cousin regardless wether it is lust, true love, caring, all are approved of the human genetics. We only share responsible for what actions we take. If we have cousins with whome we share partents and other ancestries that are not cousins themselves but strangers as 80% of the world looks like of the popuplation in total.<br />
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Because a bloodline of 12% Is enough for having feelings, cares, lust, relationship but is not enough to be prohibited from loving that person.<br />
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Now the responsibility you have is to research of your parents and grandparents wether they had relationships with their blood relatives because that would open up the discourage from our society wich proves them right, the fact that the kids will be defected if it's for that sense you get involve in a relationship with your cousin and that per-automatic makes the situation wrong. If that's not the case, you have the power to go with your cousin without assuming that you're doing something wrong to the society, but there's one thing you'll have to keep in mind to tell your kid(s) that you had them with your cousin and that won't allow them to make the same step as you did, wich is not a disaster. Just let them know what could cause them trouble and that would give them some sense of letting go of their love for their cousins. Society is only concern about the long-term issues wich is not described in details as I did it now. <br />
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What society actually doesn't know because they aren't influenced in true facts as we are who are worried about our relationships with our cousins is this:<br />
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Here are some views of how we're connected human beings:<br />
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A man meets a woman, both have parents that were strangers one to eachother themselves, both are under 35, both are healthy, neither of the two smokes, neither of the two drinks alcohol and both parts eats healthy food that makes their genes strong to live a long life.<br />
Now the chances of the two to get a defected child is 1/1001 - Wich means it is not only 'next to impossible' , it is impossible for them to receive a defected child.<br />
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Now if you consider the same fact as written above but with cousins would give you the odds of 1/501, now 501 is really huge, wich means it could happend in a 500 year unluck, we all know that our lifetime don't last for that many generations so it is actually almost as impossible as the one mentioned above, there's is no need to have any worries at all.

Well PrivatePirate, I also have the same thinking and agree with your statement that we love our cousins because we share the same blood. We cousins also have almost the same opinions and views, have similar habits and thinkings. And its even more if we are of the opposite sex and of the similar age. We get so closer that we forget that we are cousins and definitely get attracted to each other. But its not true for all. Its definitely about the similar thinking that matters for attraction.

Nah I'm not from the estates juggalomonkey and 69 sam is this question directed to me or lizz ?????

nice words & how long youve been with your/a cousin?

I take it youre not from the states?

Thank you so much :) I really thought that people would be adding negative comments so I'm glad you liked it !!!! Read my other stories please I need more views so i can post the next 3 stories.

Interesting discussion forum. I strongly disagree with people being negative about things. It takes a lot of courage to open up about something so personall I commend you