My Dogs And My LoversI must confess to having an unconditional loyalty to my dogs. Both shelter dogs, they have been with me through many years full of the joys, sorrows, and transitions in life. They love me, and me them, unconditionally. If someone doesn't like dogs, I would be less than honest to not say it would be near impossible to become very close to that human. If my dog doesn't like someone--and they are both very loving and affectionate and non judgemental--it immediately sends alarm signals that that person has done something to initiate my dogs negative response. Both my dogs sleep in my bed. I have an extra King size bed to accommodate the fact they have a remarkable ability to take up quite acrobatic positions when snoozing that can at times force me to lie twisted as a pretzel. One snores. But, to be fair, I have been known to as well.
I was with a woman for ten years. She seamlessly accepted the dogs role in the household. Since then, the reaction of other lovers varies. Some find it charming, others are similar dog nuts, and some get jealous. Invariably, when we make love, the dogs descend from the bed to the floor or another room. "Oh no, here we go again!', is the unarticulated dog reaction. Mostly, I think they are confused by the noises and movements, the loud moans, and thrashing bodies and rapid breathing. At times, I think the dogs think they may have done something wrong, viewing the pleasures of lust as an act of conflict or violence or and are alarmed and flee. My lovers invariably, impossible to ignore the pedestal I choose to place my dogs on, respond with some level of jealousy. One woman I was very close to, and whose sexual appetite matched mine resulting in a lot of time spent in bed, asked me: " Who comes first, me or your dogs." I answered honestly. "Well, if you pose the question that way. the dogs. Scoop, Buddy, and then you." it was a simple truth, although perhaps could have been couched in a more poetic form. It in no way detracted from my affection or love or lust for my lover. Perhaps dog lovers alone can understand this affinity. It is, to me, like asking " Which comes first me or your children." or "Which of your children do you like more?" It is an irrelevant question, misses the point, and doesn't have an answer. The real question one's lover is actually asking is: " Am I the only one you are in love with?" Children and dogs are in a different catagory altogether than ones human partner. I will be blunt and perhaps a bit stubborn here. If a lover cannot accept the terms of my relationship with my dogs, there is little hope for a future beyond sexual pleasure. And they deserve to know that first. As i deserve to know how they stand on my dogs as well. If my dogs like you a lot, your chances are greatly increased for our human relationship to blossom further. As they are very good innate judges of character, I respect my dogs intuition. If they don't like her, or my lover doesn't like them, I am afraid the harsh reality is we have no future. Each reader has has every right and perhaps logic to disagree, but those are my truths. Then again there may be a connection to the fact that my dogs have stood by my side, loyal, affectionate, non-judgemental, through crisis, and joy, for a much longer, uninterrupted stretch of time than any lover. These views, as i scribble these thoughts down now, occur to me as perhaps a factor in why I am at the moment single and currently deprived of the erotic joys of a lover. HHmm. And for those whose minds have wandered to the dark corners of conjecture in their minds as they read this, I assure you that my dogs in no way either fullfill, participate, or substitute for the unendingly delicious erotic wonders only a lover can me and a lover explore together. Don't **** with my dogs. or you will have no hope of ******* me