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I Adore My Husband



I adore my husband.

I can't say that enough. I adore my husband, I really do. He's a great man, far better then I deserve. He's kind and generous, a good provider, a great listener, helpful to everyone who asks, polite - a true gentleman, humorous, good looking and patient to a fault. I could go on extolling his many virtues for awhile so I'll stop now, besides he's no saint - who is?

Next week is our anniversary. On Tuesday, November 27th, we'll have been married, mostly happily, for 8 years. I was chatting with a newly found kindred spirit type friend this morning and they asked how we met, which is a somewhat cute and funny (to me anyways) story. I happily shared it with them and now I'd be delighted to share it with the rest of you.

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far away ... kidding.

I suppose the story really begins back in the year 2000-ish, if memory serves me correctly (and it's been known to be a little more faulty as of late). This was back in the days of MSN messenger and chat rooms but when we didn't all have an electronics monkey on our back and smart phones and tablets with us everywhere. Where when you left the house, sometimes you missed a call and people didn't always know what you were buying at the grocery store thanks to regular Twitter updates.

I was living in Manitoba, on my own (well with a room-mate) for the first time. We shared a small apartment and she had a computer, which I was permitted to use as wanted, provided she didn't need it for something. I had a regular group of friends that I used to chat with on MSN, most of which lived in other provinces that I had previously resided in. There was this one friend, a guy - J. I had met him through some other friends when he was in town for a brief visit and we had clicked, not at all in a romantic way, simple as cohorts of a sort. We exchanged email addresses and I used to regularly chat with him on MSN.

On this day in particular I had been talking with him for awhile before I had to leave for work. When I got home hours later he was still online. So I messaged him, making some sort of joke about what a looser he was and how he needed to get a life (which is a somewhat ironic statement now, given my EP addiction). Turns out it was not my friend J, rather his room-mate, D, my now husband. J had forgotten to sign himself out of messenger when he left and D hadn't noticed he was signed. We had a good laugh about it and talked for awhile through J's account - and in the end we exchanged email addresses and agreed to talk again. After that D and I would chat and flirt and from time to time, discussing anything and everything - he was very engaging, usually for a long period of time each time.

I didn't meet him in person until the next summer. My brother and another friend of mine - C (They are all guy friends, it's always been that way) decided to take a road trip out to Alberta to visit some friends and have a little fun. Over all the trip was enjoyable, though it started out with my brother receiving a speeding ticket minutes after we left town - but that's another tale entirely. We were staying at a friends house, and they had arranged for others to join us for supper and a friendly foot-ball game - J and D were supposed to come play.

So that's when I met D in person for the first time. I kind of tackled him, hard. I've never really been good at that whole gentle feminine thing that many of my sex are afflicted with. Growing up I was a tomboy through and through and broke more than my fair share of bones. He was not impressed and ignored me for a little while, but his bruised ego eventually recovered and later we got lost in conversation. I remember thinking, wow, somebody who talks as fast as I do and can keep up with me and has a good sense of humour ... hmmm... interesting. I left Alberta with his phone number in my pocket.

Scroll forward a couple years to the winter of 2003/2004. D and I had kept in touch and both chatted online and via telephone on a semi-regular but casual basis, it was safe to say that he was a good friend - but nothing more. That fall and winter I was going through some stuff, and he was there for me - without question, whenever and for however long I needed to talk. So we began talking more, like for hours and hours and hours - don't go to bed, have to go to work without sleeping talking. My phone bill was huge! He was really sweet and supportive and there when I needed him.

I developed a little crush on him ... okay, fine, a huge crush. I was thinking about him all the time, wondering what he was doing, how his day was going, if he was going to call me later - the usual things a young girl thinks about. One late, lonely January night. when we had been talking for awhile, in a fit of courage I told him how I was feeling and asked if he would ever be interested in dating. He was kinda quiet and evasive at first, so I thought I had crossed a line - I can be a little forward and intimidating to guys (no really, honest, I can). Point in fact, he never actually answered the question during that conversation, and we hung up with it hanging in between us.

It took 3 days for him to "man up" as I like to say ... and send me an email (seriously? an email? you couldn't call?). Those three days were torture for me, I thought that i had lost a good friend, I should have kept my mouth shut, obviously he's not interested in me that way and I just screwed it up! Turns out I was wrong, turns out he was interested an attracted to me too and wanted to explore it further. He wrote that he had been thinking about it for sometime, but was worried about it wreaking our friendship should things not work out. However after thinking about it for 3 long torturous (for me anyways) days, he'd decided he wanted to take the risk - so we kind of started "dating" ... but as we were about 12 hours apart it was difficult.

I had been planning a trip out to Vancouver to visit a friend (of the female persuasion this time) in March, now I extended the trip by a week and made arrangements to visit him in Calgary. It was the best trip I've ever taken. We went on actual dates, got to know each other even better, I met his friends and his parents, we talked, got to hold hands etc. I have many wonderful memories, but sharing them all will soon turn this tale into a novel. I will share one amusing little tid bit: turns out that despite the fact we'd already known each other for a few years, he was really shy ... so no kissing,

I returned to Manitoba with a blossom of love in my heart and plans for him to return the visit as soon as opportunity allowed. In the mean time we kept emailing and talking on the phone on a daily basis, as much as possible. All the time really and about everything. Everything that would take you months and years to learn about a person but because we couldn't actually spend time together we got to talk about. It got very serious very quickly.

In May he came out to visit me in Manitoba for a couple weeks. We did the same things as before, going on real dates, holing hands, him meeting my friends and family, etc. Best of all, we finally had our first kiss, late one night when cuddled up watching a movie at my mother's house. It was simple and sweet, and then I proceeded to teach him how to kiss properly! We had some really fun and funny adventures together that week and when he went home I knew I was a gonner, head over heels in love.

Things progressed quickly from there. I moved to Calgary in June, he helped my find a place and a Job and we got engaged in July ... sort of. Friends of ours got married in July and shortly thereafter we went to Vancouver for something, while there we began to talk about getting married. Attending that wedding must have rubbed of on us because by the end of the trip we were planning our wedding.

I never did get an official proposal (yes I still torture him about that) and as I am not a huge jewellery person and only ever wanted to wear a solitaire diamond engagement ring, not two rings (engagement and wedding band) I didn't even get the ring that we picked out together until our wedding day. I wanted to wait to get married next June, but D wanted to get married right away - September. I'm good, but not so good as to be able to plan a wedding in a little over a month - so we compromised with November. Also, this happened to be the last month my sister would be able to attend a wedding, because she was pregnant and due in December.

That's it, that's how we met and eight years ago we were married on November 27th, 2004 at 1:00 pm in the afternoon. I married the man of my dreams, he's my heart, my soul, my world, my everything.

I really do adore my husband.
Hongruilin Hongruilin 31-35, F 50 Responses Nov 23, 2012

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I really admire you. Hope i will have a love story like that.

Thank you so much, that's very kind of you. I'll cross my fingers for ya. :-)

Nice story.

I love my wife. I adore her

That's awesome. :-)

Cheers!! So beautiful!!!

Thanks! :-)

Hi, its amazing how you feel so positive about your spouse. I truly appreciate.
I had been sailing in a similar boat, but somehow..... equations seem to have changed. Could you write about how you dealt with difference of opinions or squabbles..... its silly to ask.... but you know, sometimes getting to know how others behave might actually help one to correct their own flaws............
coz I m in a state where I want to love the way I used to, feel good n happy n positive the way I used to but I AM JUST NOT ABLE TO....coz the person has changed so drastically after marriage, that I constantly wonder, Is this whom I loved with all the senses I had.............. I never expected that I d be asked to change myself, my core by a person who used to appreciate everything that I was.............. it is very discouraging for me, when the person who i looked upto for literally everything says that I m irresponsible, dont know how to speak to people,lost in my own world, not behaving in a befitting manner for his house, not making the house a home, is unappreciative of all the things i do with love and effort, and considers it my duty........... I have ended up in the downspiral, where i began to doubt my own brain n actions, and started believing I m all wrong and unworthy..... and to top it all, He says.... he behaves and expects that way in order to make me a perfect person for his family because he loves me.......I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND.........whether he is right or I m wrong Or what the hell is happenning :-) literally!!!....................... now i m just going with the flow n trying to laugh off everything in order to keep all arguments at bay ...... wonder when the dam will give way.............! :-)

*huggles for now and promises to respond to this better and in detail tomorrow*

Great story

Thanks

Beautiful and sweet story...why dont u make it a Movie...? I think It has all kinds of elements required for a movie....suspense...romance, twists and turns...wow...;)

Haha, I'm sure it's really not that interesting. Thanks though. :-)

"Best of all, we finally had our first kiss, late one night when cuddled up watching a movie at my mother's house. It was simple and sweet, and then I proceeded to teach him how to kiss properly! "
This is one of the scene out of the story which really attracted me...;) Teaching how to kiss properly...wow....;)

*smiles*

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nice to see a positive relationship story! thanks for sharing

You're most welcome! Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment.

So similar to my experience. He never did officially ask me to marry him, it just.....happened lol

Glad to hear I'm not the only one!! I keep joking that I'm waiting for mine. Maybe this year on our tenth. Haha/

Beautiful, sweet story!

Thanks.

Somewhere in my stories you're likely to find my own tale... somewhat more sordid... okay. A LOT more sordid. LOL.

I did read a little already about your history and how you met. ;-)

I love this story! It reminds me so much of the story of how I met my husband <3 ... thanks for sharing. Maybe I'll put up my own story too :)

Thank you so much for the comment. It makes me smile to know it reminded you of how you met your own husband. You absolutely should share the story!!

I laughed out loud when I read "back in the day before people knew if you were out at the grocery store or not due to regular twitter updates."

Haha. It's really kinda crazy how involved we've all gotten in each other's lives!!

I try to avoid mainstream social media as much as possible. Don't even like having my pic taken

I dislike having my pic taken, but that's for a whole slew of other reasons. Haha. I'm not a huge fan of social media, but I do dabble in it some, thanks to certain friends. :-)

Yeah its probably the reason none of my friends keep in touch lol

Haha.

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It's not often I read long stories like this.. but damn that was a good story. It's nice to read about a happy marriage on here (for once). 1 question - were you his first? This is a novel in the making for sure. Actually I would definitely see a movie on this. I'm not into romantics but, I don't know, the way you said it has made it all the more attractive. Congrats on hitting the jackpot.

*smiling*

Well thank you, for both taking the time to read and to comment. And yeah, I know I hit the jackpot, he's pretty darned amazing (even on the days I want to smack him with a skillet, lol).

As for your question, yes, I was his first. I guess now I'm also his last and his only. :-)

Makes you feel special right. First, last and only. This is definitely my insecurities talking, but I would find it uncomfortable (or my ego would) if I knew my next relationship was my first. I've had a few, but.. when you said that you had to give him kissing practice, I thought..wow.. I would totally be upset if I was in that situation. Not upset at you, but at myself. We all have our egos I guess. When you tackled him roughly that day, I would have taken that..that's something I wouldn't mind. But the kissing part... how did he handle that? He probably handled it well, but I'm curious.

He handled it very well, after all it led to better and more kissing, and then eventually other things followed. Hehe.

good story! you are very immature...you need to grow up for your own sake
why the hell do you think you dont deserve him? is this guilt of something? child abuse? cheating? rebound? anyway past is past! Past is to be accepted, not necessarily agreed to or approved of but accepted, let go, learn and move on

I actually like your story and want to believe that you are honest true and real!

Change is a fundamental state of existence, despite the knowledge of which most of us show some sort of resistance to it. Be it individuals or organizations, there is skepticism when some form of change is introduced into an otherwise predictable system of life. Accept and embrace change, grow with it, grow up, grow up with ur husband! be better version of yourself!

be more mature for your own sake, for your husband and for your children! Maturity comes from experience, exposure, information of the surrounding, choice, action & regular practice...

All the best
tc

Oye vey!!

First: I don't have any children, thanks for the assumption and taking no time at all to learn more about me. Stelar train of thought there.

Secondly: I happen to have a pretty great marriage, even with the ups and downs we all experience as a part of life. Love my husband, and he love me, just the way I am (even when immature in the eyes of people like you).

Thirdly, and most importantly: Were you to have spent any time at all getting to know me or reading other stories of mine before you so un-eloquently opening your mouth and inserting both your feet, you'd have discovered I'm someone who rather adores and embraces change, is very good at letting things go and not having regrets, tries as hard as humanly possible not to let my past affect me (which by the way, is none of your business) and is considered to be rather grown up, mature and a rather awesome version of myself all things considered.

So thanks, for taking the time to read and comment on my story of love and adoration and all things awesome about my husband and my not being so full of myself to think that I just automatically deserved someone as awesome as he is and don't need to be thankful for that, but kindly please take your self-righteous and haughty worldly wisdom elsewhere. I'm good here.

*blows a kiss*

Wow, Hong!! You were very merciful here! Are you going soft?

*laughs* ... I thought I'd try turning over a new leaf. ;-)

HAHAHA foot in mouth much, dude?! Oh!

TirthankarDas, were you to choose to kill yourself, I would authentically respect and support that decision.

lol, lol, LOL!!!

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I'm glad you shared this. Not only was it well written and enjoyable to read, but it reminds us all that marriage isn't so bad. We're surrounded by negative stories of marriages gone wrong. Even my boyfriend says marriage is pointless and ruins a relationship (yeah, looks like I'll never get married)! So this is nice to see.
Maybe I should force my boyfriend to read it ;-)

No, marriage isn't "so bad" at all!! It's not a bed of roses, bowl of cherries, rainbows, unicorns and puppy dogs blissfully happy all the time - far from it. In fact, it's work, lots of work, and hard work sometime. But ....

It's is also the best, most wonderful, amazing, satisfying, close your eyes, smile, you feel blessed and more loved then you ever deserved experience you'll ever have. When you find that one you click with and can't see spending your life without, it's worth every single second of frustration and wanna bang your head against the wall irritation. I promise. Lol.

Me and my boyfriend have an amazing relationship which is why I feel that marriage would not affect us negatively at all. He is my soul mate after all. However, I am happy to live my life with him unmarried, than not have him at all!

That's awesome, good for you guys. I hope you continue to have a great relationship!! Marriage or not. ;-)

A real relationship is more than just the dates, holding hands and kissing. It's about accepting each other's weirdness and flaws. It's about being yourself and finding happiness together. It's about seeing an imperfect person perfectly.

No relationship is perfect and we won't always agree on everything, we made a vow to each other for better or for worst, we have had our bad days and we have had our good days, but through it all we have had each other.

Relationship is a big word and can be both very complicated and simple depending upon people, their choices, their, emotions, their luck and the circumstances! It needs to nurtured, developed, evolved, taken care of and maintained over a long period of time! It needs love, care, respect & trust – the 4 most important ingredients, if one goes missing, it fails! For being a couple 2 must have chemistry & compatibility! Relationships aren't easy, they take hard work from both people, equal amount of giving and taking, respect and compromise.

For a relationship to work over time, it takes more than just finding the right person — it's also a matter of being the right person. And while relationshipshave a lot to do with the connection between two people, it takes work from both parties to strengthen this connection and keep it alive.

As far as what's more important, compatibility or fun, both elements are necessary for a healthy, fulfilling relationship, and their level of importance varies with different types and stages of relationships. Compatibility can encompass a variety of things including similar interests and phases in life, whether or not both people want the same level of commitment in the relationship, and most importantly, whether there is a willingness to accept each other's differences and pursue the relationship anyway. Fun and passion are often more prominent in (though certainly not exclusive to) the earlier stages of getting to know someone, and compatibility and dependability often become increasingly important as the relationship becomes more serious There is no set pattern that determines the types of relationships people choose throughout their lifetime. For example, a young adult may want the fun and excitement of dating without the responsibility that comes with a long-term relationship, and an older individual may seek companionship and someone with whom they can settle down, or the situations can be reversed. Types of relationships and the reasons individuals choose them are as varied as the individuals themselves. But a lastingrelationship requires a balance of fun, dependability, passion, and compatibility, among a number of other factors. What gets thrown into the mix that makes up a relationship depends on the people involved, their values, and their choices.

The best relationships take the longest to work out. If you love them enough you will try anything and everything to keep them in your life.

Marriage is Like a Box! Most people get married believing a myth that marriage is a beautiful box full of all the things they have longed for: companionship, intimacy, friendship, etc. The truth is that marriage at the start is an empty box. You must put something in before you can take anything out. There is no love in marriage. Love is in people. And people put love in marriage. There is no romance in marriage. You have to infuse it into your marriage. A couple must learn the art and form the habit of giving, loving, serving, praising keeping the box full. If you take out more than you put in, the box will be empty. The most important ingredient in marriage is love. However, not just passionate, emotional feelings of love, but the commitment and covenant of love derived through actions. In marriage a husband and wife will go through droughts where they don’t necessarily have passionate love for one another. They may not feel the same way they did when they were dating or in the beginning of their marriage. Yet, because marriage is a covenant, husbands and wives are bound to each other by law through their vows, preventing any easy escape to search for those feelings with someone else. If a husband or wife chooses to love each other, despite a lack of feelings, they will see that love will grow. If a person loves another through their actions, regardless of their feelings, they will eventually begin to feel love for that person. Likewise, if a person mistreats someone, eventually they will feel hatred towards the person they are mistreating...

You should really have written this as a story of your own rather then a comment on a comment on mine.

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I stumbled onto the wrong topic area. I need broken relationship commiserations but this was a solid read. Thanks.

lol, you're welcome.

That's beautiful.

Thank you.

Just stopping by to say Congrats! This one always makes me smile H. It's funny how some of the seemingly random events and chance encounters we have turn out to be quite significant and in fact weave the fabric of our lives..Happy 9th Sweetie *huge hugs and a kiss on the cheek*

Thank you dear Tiger. It was a pretty good 9th anniversary, and I completely agree with you - how interesting those "random" events can sometimes turn out to be ...

*huggles*

A beautiful story. I'm in a similar position where I'm totally in love with my wife, i feel very lucky indeed, here's to people like us!!
X

Hear, hear! :-)

Such an awe-inspiring story.....Happy Anniversary! :)

Thank you. I'm not sure how awe inspiring, and we have more then our fair share of troubles sometimes, but he really is my whole world. It's just not the same without him.

:)

I think tales like yours make me believe that even today a modern-day love affair can lead to an amazingly beautiful marriage and bonding between two persons.

wish YOU and D live happily throughout the rest of your lives.

Aww, thank you, that's very kind of you. I really hope so too. :-)

my pleasure

*huggles*

i'm kinda getting first hand experience of how adorable you are in real life

*smiles*
Why do you say that????

'coz you are genuinely sweet and very infectious

*blushing*

Aww, thanks!!! You're too kind. I might adore that. ;-)

see a genuine lady like behavior..

could i pm you?

If you like. I'm on vacation at the moment and totally not on my normal schedule, but I'll respond if able, :-)

i'll take a raincheck today then..

have a great vacation....

Gracias. :-)

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Hello Hongruilin,
It is VERY rare to hear a woman say the things you do. I'm serious! Its wonderful! Especially in the western countries. In America a woman is much more likely to tell her husband what a looser he is,how stupid he is,how un manly, week or some other very offensive thing which only drives a wedge between them and destroys the marriage. How lucky your husband is. This is such a serious problem now that hundreds of thousands of men are marrying foreign women.

Perhaps it's because I'm Canadian. ;-) lol

Thank you very much for your comment. I do love and adore my husband.

Met my wife in 1948...dated four years off and on...married in 1952....three daughters, and 9 grandchildren, 22 great grandchildren, she passed with lung cancer...today I am widowed having had a beautiful wife and life and now enjoy all that, but sadly without her, and 7, almost 8 great great grandkids...LIFE IS GOOD...

I don't know how I managed to miss this. I'm so sorry for your loss, but I am so happy that you were able to have such a lovely life with her and that life is still good for you.

*huggles*

Wow

I am always pleased to find people who love their spouse as I do.

It\'s really nice to know things like that in a world like this one. :-)

Wonderful ..simply breathtaking ...be happy always

Thank you. We try. :-)

Thank you for sharing your story, it was very sweet! Wish you guys a long and happy marriage!

You\'re welcome. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. Also for your kind wishes. :-)

You are right, you are lucky to have him in your life. It;s very rare to find love that stays solid. He's also lucky to have you too. I am 42, never met a decent man or have had just one good loving relationship in my lifetime. Your story was nice to read.

Thank you very much, I truly recognize how blessed I am, I really do. We're not perfect and we have a LOT of bumps in the road sometimes, but we're in it together. I know how rare that is.

I have around 5 girls friends from high school , that have all been married as long as me . 20 to 23 years of marriage , and still going strong .

That's super awesome! Wow, how much like a Valley Girl/Teenager did I just sound?! Lol

We all met our husbands as teenagers , and we live in a valley ! LOL

lol, lol, LOL!!! Now that's funny!!

It's good that you appreciate it. Too many girls don't and when they cheat on their good partners, it leaves me very angry because I've never had a good relationship and to watch them taking limited just cheese me off. They don't know how good they got it. I know nobody's relationships are perfect. Nobody's. It takes two people to make things work and it takes two willing enough to stay together as a team.

I try to never judge, you don't know what's going on in others loves and behind closed doors but I understand your feelings. In any regards, I agree it takes to and I am happy to have my husband.

it is very nice to see that true love does exist........... couples can look upto you all

owsome valley

Hello Myalee,
your not alone. I'm 50 and have run into the same problem. All my adult life I have dreamed and looked for the right woman for me, the right match, but I have not found her. It's really nice to hear a story like this one. I haven't given up hope yet. There's not much time,but still time. I admit that I became discouraged and gave up for periods of time. but I'm determined and believe I can find her.

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i love the fact you guys kept holding on each other even though u were at a long distance realationship at some point ... God bless u both :)

Thank you. :-)