In 8th grade I was definately in a confused stage of my life. I had never liked females before but 8th grade changed everything. I guess I have kindof always been a teachers pet, atleast my friends always called me one. But this was entirely different. My math teacher was interesting to me, she was funny, smart and very bossy for some reasons the qualities just got me. I had just met her it was a knew year but my brother knew her, my brother is much older then me he has already finished college and has a family, he knew my math teacher because of her husband. My math teachers husband and my brother became friends quick. Unfortunately that just made our bond stronger, and something happened I guess i grew attracted to her. So as time went on I started to have fantisies about her and it was just a simple little crush. But then she pretty much became my bestfriend and from that point on I couldn't stop thinking about her, and to this day I am still going crazy about her, I have had these feelings for her for atleast a year now and I am pretty much going crazy, I am still super close to her especially since I baby sit her kids. Now this up coming summer she is going to be my teacher for independent study which means it would be just us alone somewhere were people aren't around. I don't know what will happen and I hope nothing does because I don't want to ruin our bond nor get her into any trouble. And I love her to much to see her get hurt. So I am just staying friends with her it helps a lot to be friends with her and talk to her and see her pretty much everyday. But I still love her. And seeing her with her husband pretty much kills me, because some how I think I could be better for her, which probably isn't true at all. And she is totally against cheating so nothing would ever happen so its kindof a sad love but I don't know what to. So advice is good if anyone cares to share. (: But sometimes I just wish I could wisk her away to a deserted island and it could be just us there forever, taht would be sooo nice. Ha, well thats just my dream so yahh. Ohh well :p I guess you have to live life in strange ways. But I actually dream about her, she is in my dreams and it feels so real just us together in my dream and then i wake up and I am like **** go back to bed, get that dream back! But it never comes back and its not real, so even though my dreams are my dreams my feelings are still my feelings. And I still love her. Unbelievably love her.  

thatmathteacher thatmathteacher
18-21, F
1 Response Nov 25, 2008

I love my teacher too, except rather than being a year, it's been 3 almost 4. She's leaving (i'm also female) at the end of the year. I have this incredible bond with her but all i want is for her to be happy (although I would LOVE if she was with me). There's only a 7 year age difference. I definatly wouldn't consider myself lesbian, though. She is just incredible to me. I look up to her greatly. I've never had so much respect for someone in my life. From day 1 i've loved her. I'm just going to stop now because every word i write makes me think of her more and it hurts too much to think about my life in the next few years. Here to talk if you need someone.<br />
'No one's perfect until you fall in love'