The Story Of Us.....really Need Help And Feedback Please!!!!!!

It all started in 7th grade. I could never forget the summer of 2007. It was a hot summer night and i went to the annual street fair with my best girl friend. We ran into her friend carmine and he was with a boy named sam. After speaking to this boy i couldnt help but blush every time i spoke to him because i thought he was so cute! We talked for a little and i felt such a connection with him but about 10 minutes later he walked off with the girl that he had come with.This was when i knew i had no chance. I told myself that I should forget about my crush on him and just move on because there was no chance. However, 2 weeks later i received an instant message from a random screen name. It was sam. He had asked his friend carmine for my screen name so that he could message me. I was shocked when this happened. As the conversation progressed, he asked me to the movies with his best guy friend and my best girl friend. How could i say no? So we went. We all ended up hating the movie so we sat in the back of theater and played truth or dare (we were immature middle schoolers). After a few rounds, sams friend had dared me and sam to kiss. I was petrified. I had never kissed a boy before in my life! But i got over the fear and we did. It is a moment i will never forget. After that, we were so drawn to each other. He put his arm around me and even held my hand! The beginning of the school year rolled around and of course, we compared scheduled and had every single class together! This was the year that we become best friends.He would come over EVERY day after school, and on the weekends his mom would let him sleep over. The hard part was, was that we were best friends...but not dating and everyone knew i had such strong feelings for him so it was really hard. One night we were having one of our normal sleepovers and he asked me out and after he did he said "you know me and you are going to be forever right?" He swears he did not even plan it but it was valentines day when he asked me, i guess cupid struck him? Anyways, our relationship was AMAZING we dated for 2 amazing years and then broke up the beginning of junior year.
The reason why we broke up was because he had a dream of becoming a united states marine and i did not support it. Looking back it was very selfish of me but i just couldnt imagine loosing him. He ended up leaving me becuase of it.
We didnt talk for about 4 straight months until we reunited. Senior year we started hooking up again and when he would get drunk he would tell him he still had feelings for me. He told me the reason why he stopped talking to me was because he knew he had to leave me in the summer for bootcamp.
Well, once he got to bootcamp he would non stop write me letters. Some said "I miss those beautiful eyes of yours" or "everytime i look at the picture you send me i cant help but smile" and at the end of every letter it said "love always"
He got his 10 days leave but we couldnt see eachother becuase i am in college and have classes. We ended up getting into a rountine of texting and we talk on the phone for hours. before he says good night he always sends me a kissy face and a heart and the other night he actually called me babe.
I am so confused. I miss him more and more each day. I am so jealous of the girls who post on this and call their marine their own. I wish he was mine. Im in desperate need of feedback guys!
mg1994 mg1994
18-21, F
Dec 13, 2012