Struggling With My Wife Who Is Cheating, And Now Wants A DivorceMe and my wife have been married for 9 years. We have 4 beautiful kids, a home and good jobs. We have had our issues, but no cheating. Recently, she has had contact with a friend from high school that she never really knew. Now, after only 2 weeks, she texts him all the time and when I go to work they spend hours talking to each other. My wife tells me it is nothing but she also doesn't share what the nothing is. I found out that she went to see him and was at his house all night long when she said she was with friends. I have had all this trust in her and now I find it hard to have.
It got to the point that I said that if he is a guy he will eventually try to woo you away, but she said no. She at one time agreed that to stop talking to him to include texting. She was not able to it.
With in 2 days, she has decided she wants a divorce. She says she needs her space, with him. I love my wife. She said that she has been lonely and I haven't tended to her needs in 9 years. She also doesn't want to work on us anymore. She says that it is too late for me to "show" her anything. This guy has stepped in and was able to convince her that he is worth more than nine years of our marriage.
She says that she has tried to communicate with me, always feeling that she has to initiate sex, plan dinner etc. I know that I haven't showed her that I really do adore her, love here and want to be with her to the way she needed it. I don't know why. But now, I am able to communicate with her. It might be because of the fear that she could actually leave, i don't know. I don't want to fight with her over this, we are going to get counselling, but until then, she keeps insisting that we are done. I am so heartbroken and emotional because I really didn't know how bad she felt.
So, what can I do. I don't want her to go with the other guy. I want to show her that I am more than capable of saving our relationship. How can I get her to see this. Or is this the end because I am guy that has trouble in communication with my wife?