The Nigerian Swindlers

My God! Evidently, I am a savior and I arrived at the myspace social network just in the nick of time! No sooner did I hang out my "nameplate" than I received a dozen or so desperate appeals for help from poor, miserable women who all, coincidentally, live in Nigeria. Odiri, Mariam, Tricia, Rose, and Janet are just a few of the pathetic, tortured souls who have implored me to rescue them from their horrendous plights. These sad, broken wretches are so destitute that they cannot even afford proper clothing. Wearing little more than flimsy shreds of underwear, too weak to do more than lift their legs up on their beds, these pitiful derelicts are utterly bereft of dignity.

Astonishingly enough, every single one of these groveling wastrels were married to distinguished gentlemen who were all uniformly slaughtered by an unspecified enemy. Now, reduced to little more than human debris, these ladies have been forced to flee for their lives. Fugitives, they are begging me to furnish them each with just a few thousand dollars in good faith funds in return for which I have their solemn and unqualified promises that I shall be rewarded with God's blessing and millions of dollars. Like I said, did I get here in the nick of time or what?!

WraithSword WraithSword
56-60, M
2 Responses Mar 25, 2009

Lol. God's blessing can go a long way=)

i love your stories-they are great!