I Run For My Life...I have always been in control of my life... ALWAYS! I am strong willed, fun, energetic, motivated, hard working, and pretty stable mentally, physically, emotionally and financially. About a year ago, life threw me a curve ball out of left field. My world pretty much collapsed arond me. I had never felt the way I was feeling, had no idea what to do to overcome my obstacles and for the first time ever, had lost complete control over every aspect in my life. ( or so I thought at the time)
Due to all the stress I was facing, I couldn't eat, sleep, think straight, or get out of my own head. The only thing that seemed to ease some of the pain I was feeling was putting my ipod on, and walking my dog for miles and miles each day. I had always been fairly active. I liked to kayak, swim, hike, ride my bike, hit up the gym a few times a week, practice yoga, and of course, walk my dog. However, due to how I was feeling, my normal routine was not relieving any of the stress, hurt, anger, and depression I was going through.
I had all this pent up energy. Where it came from I have no idea. Like I said, I couldn't eat or sleep. One day I put on my sneakers and went for a run. I ran hard, I ran as fast as I could, I ran and ran and ran. (really, it wasnt that far) Being that I am not a runner... a few miles was alot for me. FINALLY! Something that was relieving some of the torture I was dealing with. As the months went by I was still running. My endurance was increasing, my body was looking leaner, and my mind was clearer. I could now make it through the day without beng miserable. Running was helping me to regain control over how I was feeling, how I looked, how I dealt with my problems. Instead of drinking, I ran. Instead of crying, I ran. Instead of eating, I ran. It was amazing!
Now a year later, just this past weekend, I ran my first race. I did very well and exceeded my own expectations for myself. WOW! I finally get why people become addicted to running! All the energy from the other runners, the spectators cheering you on, and the support from my friends and family rooting for me is definitely a feeling like no other. The satisfaction of accomplishing something that just some time ago I thought was unimaginable and unattainable was awesome. Crossing that finish line and accompolishing something you have worked so hard for, for so long was by far the most exhilarating feeling I have ever felt. Now, I am back to my old self, all my troubles have come to pass, I am better than I was before, and running was my vehicle to transformation. It has gotten me out of that dark place I once was in to the happy place in life I am in today. I am proud to say... I RUN FOR MY LIFE!!! :)
Amycakes 26-30, F 6 Mar 20, 2012