I Am Happy In My Own Thoughts

I like walking beside the ocean in the early morning, before any others have awakened and the day is so fresh.... seeing what the dark night has washed up on the shore, wondering where it came from, and where it will go. I like feeling the waves lapping at my feet and knowing those same waves lapped at a foreign shore that I will most likely never set foot upon, but somehow, by the sharing of the waves, we are one.
I like sitting in the shade of beautiful tree on a summers day... the smell of fresh mown grass, the chill of ice cold lemonade, the weighless flight of a butterfly. Summer is youthful energy, vibrant and alive. I like the seasons of planting, and the assurance of a harvest. I like sudden summer storms with lightening flashing and thunder crashingn and waking up to the clean air after the storm, and surveying the damage, pondering the frailty life, how quickly things can be broken, it reminds me that no matter how strong I feel, to take nothing for granted.
I like the crisp cool evenings of fall. I like watching the leaves change colors. I like the excitement the earth feels knowing the work of another summer is done and a long awaited rest is just around the corner. I like hot apple cider and crackling fires. I like the cruch of the leaves beneath my feet. I like flannel shirts, and hot cocoa. I like the eerie sadness of knowing that all that has been alive around me is dying... and I take comfort in knowing it will be reborn, new and fresh, and in fall I find the promise of life. Nothing last forever, and nothing is ever lost. Fall is my most complex season.
I like waking up to a layer of frost... I like how I can see each individual little flake of frost, the details, not like actual snowflakes falling wildly looking like just white blobs... but seeing all the intricate details frozen in time there on my windshield. Almost as if God sent fairies to paint my car overnight to remind me of the uniquness of each of us... of how delicate we are, and yet how strong. I like waking up to a pristine blanket of white across my lawn, where for a time, I can feel like I am alone in the universe... where, if even only briefly, I can feel for a moment like my part of the earth is undisturbed. I like soft wet snow falling gently on my faces, like kisses from heaven. I like the anger and the force of old man winter when he sends the winds howling and the ice like daggers to drive into your skin and I like knowing I am safe in the house that jack built, surrounded by my loving family, safe from the dangers of the world, and I settle into a comfortable routine of cassaroles, board games, and then comes the holiday season.
I used to like Christmas lights, and childrens stories and the promise of Santa Clause... the universal symbol of once in a while we will put others first, we will share in brotherhood, love for God, miracles for those who believe in the magic of Christmas. Those days are gone, but I still like the dead of winter when God surveys the earth and decides one again, that life should continue...and I look forward to the day when he decides it is time again to send his son to save us from what we have become... Until that day, I will enjoy the gifts I have been given. I will cry when I feel like crying, I will laugh when my heart sings. And all this is reaffirmed in me as I lay wrapped in my white cacoon...
I like spring. I like seeing the first tulips coming up through the snow and I thrill at the wonder of all the growing they were doing while the ground appeared so desolate. So quiet, yet so proud they throw forth their brilliant colors to herald the coming of new life. I love how the springs first warm rays call to all the people, who, like me, have been hibernating wrapped in the warmth of their families and who now burst out doors filled with renewed energy, hopeful and friendly, their exuberant greetings as they rekindle over the fence relationship with neighbors unseen for months. I wait patiently for the robbin.. knowing she will come...wondering when. I delight in seeing the catapillar... wondering if she knows the changes about to take place in her. I delight in the circle of life as all the little critters start being born...surrounded by so much innocence, my spirit soars. As the creepy crawlies beginto emerge from the earth, I am reminded of God's love for us, even if no one else likes us.... God does, and we will prevail!

Yes, I like sitting by the lake, and watching the water, and wondering about the life beneath the water. I like watching the clouds and dreaming of what life will be when I walk on them instead of under them. I like finding the fairies and the giants and the dragons that float in the sky above me. I like being outdoors when there are not people, and cars, and horns, to disturb my thoughts. I don't really know what I think about.... but I know I feel better when I am done. I guess that must be when God tells me His secrets.
lms2 lms2
May 19, 2012