How I Learned To Love Smoking

I found this site when I googled "i love smoking" :-)
I'm not native English, so sorry for my mistakes.

I started smoking two years ago when I was 15. And before that, I was cracy anti-smoking. I was bitching some of my friends when they tried smoking. I even broke with my best friend when she started to smoke. Why would anybody smoke? It's so bad for your health, it's smells awfully, it's totally useless, there's no reason even to try it. So I told everybody that I will never smoke.
But after some time I was changing my thoughts. Officially, I was still the cracy non-smoker. But I started to observe my smoking buddies and was thinking by myself:

Ok, smoking is so bad: But all the smokers look so happy and relaxed when they smoke ...

Ok, smoking is bad for your health: But my smoking friends are all fine ...

Ok, only "bad" people are smokers: But some of my really cool and nice friends are smoking ...

So there must be some great secret behind it! It can't be that bad! Smoking started to fascinate me. I started to imagine how it is and how I would hold a cigarette and inhale the smoke. But I didn't dare to try it, because I was still a smoking opponent. I started to feel really bad about it.

My chance came when I went to a camp with a youth theater group that I joined shortly before. I did not know the other people in the group before, and they didn't know me (and my official smoking opposition) before. But I knew there were some smokers in the group. So I purchased a pack of Marlboro lights (it's called Marlboro Gold here) before, secretly of course. And on the first evening on the camp, I summoned up my courage and asked a girl of my age to show me how to smoke. :-))))

Ok, the first cigarette was hard learning. I think you know what I mean. :-) But still it was fascinating. An hour later, I tried the second cigarette, and I simply loved and enjoyed it.
And I think I was addicted immediately. Not yet to the Nicotine, but the "procedure" and the feeling. And the spirit among the smokers. (The real Nicotine-addiction came somewhen later.) So I smoked the whole pack over the night.

When the camp week was over, I was warried how to decide. Should I be a secret smoker and hold up my official line of opposing smoking? I tried it, one or two weeks long. But then I realized how ridiculous it is to hide. So, in the next few weeks, I had to listen to the bad phrases that I was telling recently: "Oh, you started smoking? YOU? But it causes cancer and blblbl...." and "But I thought you belong to the GOOD ones that don't smoke..." I took all my currage and told them that I changed my mind. It worked after a while. The other smokers at home that I was insulting before, they were making some jokes and then accepted me. And I was happy. I even told my parents pretty soon, and they said "ok, we don't like it, but we won't change your attitude. So please don't smoke at home, and everything else is your decision."

Since then, I really love smoking. I am so glad that I tried it and that I started. I think it was somehow my destiny. I think I was really crazy before, when I was insulting smokers. But maybe that was my destiny also. Today, I smoke about one pack of Marlboro Gold (the light one), maybe a little less on a normal day, and a little bit more when I'm going out.
I think that's ok, and it's definitely not much when I compare to some of my friends.

Why do I love smoking? There are so many things that come to my mind when I think about it! Non-smoker won't understand it, same as I haven't understood it before. But smokers will understand it.
I love the feeling of inhaling the smoke and exhaling it, the little hit inside my body when I inhale. The cloud of smoke that comes out of my lungs when I breath out. It's so cool the outbreathing when sunlight shines on it and it's getting golden! I think when you smoke, you start to realize how your breath works, you can even see it, and I like it. By the way, a friend told me that about three quarters of the nicotine and tar stay in your lungs or enter you body, so all the smoke that you exhale is just a quarter of what you dragged from the cigarette. That's fascinating.
And I love the whole "procedure". Taking out my pack, taking out a cigarette, lighting it, the sound of burning paper when I drag, inhale and exhale as above, holding the cig between my fingers and watching the smoke coming out of my cig... and I'm mad about tapping the ash off! And snipping my cig away when it's finished.

What I really love is to observe the ember (is it the right word?) when I smoke in the darkness, and how it lights up when I drag...

And (somehow crazy) I love the pure fact that I am a smoker, that I dared it, that I simply do it. Simply holding my pack in my hand when I walk in the street fascinates me. I am somehow "proud" that I'm a smoker. By the way, I love Marlboro Gold especially because I like the package design, with all the white and gold on it. As if the colours would tell me: "This is a relly light cigarette, it doesn't harm you that much. Just enjoy your smoke and your life." (Ok I don't really now how to describe what I mean...)

I like the relaxed feeling when I smoke. I love the "group spirit" among smokers. It is so easy to come to know each other among smokers. And (crazy again) the addiction fascinates me. Nicotine addicition is only mentaly but not really physically I think. Ok, when you're on a train or a plane and can't smoke or when I'm in a boring class it's pure horror. But the feeling afterwards, when I can smoke again and take out a cigarette and inhale the smoke into my lungs, that's so cool and after one or two deep inhales I feel so happy. It more than compensates the suffer before.

Even more crazy: Sometimes I am fascinated by the thought that the cigarette smoke contains so much unhealthy stuff and still I'm totally fine. Putting myself at some kind of "danger" that does not scare me. By the way, I love my life, and I love my body and my health, and I do a lot of sports. I can't see a contradiction to my smoking. Because I think I don't smoke that much, and I prefer light cigarettes. So, I think I consume not much tar and nicotine every day, and my lungs are absolutely happy :-). I'm a young smoker, so smoking does not harm me yet.
Ok, you can discuss this point. And it might change somewhen later on. But I wan't to enjoy my life right now, and I don't want to think much into future. I love smoking, so I have to take the risks.
And I think when smoking makes me happy, the happiness is good for my body and my health. For example, smoking is so good against stress.
Also, I want to keep my weight low. I'm a little towards anorexic. Smoking helps me with that. (If I had other reasons to quit smoking, the fear to put on weight would overrule all reasons.) During the whole morning, I don't eat but smoke some cigarettes instead.

For me the greatest cigarette of the day is the first one in the morning. I think that's normal for regular smokers. As I told you before, my parents don't want me to smoke at home, so I have a quick shower and coffee in the morning, and then I go out to school full of desire for a cigarette. I love cold sunny mornings, fresh air, and the taste of the first smoke of the day.
But I really wish I could move out and have my own appartement pretty soon. I dream to have a first coffee and a cigarette directly after getting up!

And now I'm pretty happy that I found this site so that I could tell you my story how I hated smoking and how and why I learned to love it!

Cheers Laura
laura94 laura94
18-21, F
20 Responses Sep 24, 2012

What if you got pregnant? Would you carry on smoking then?

Wow, its so rare to come across someone your age with these views. A pleasant change! I liked the bit about getting your own place so you could enjoy a coffee and smoke as soon as you wake. I do that every day, and I love it. Smoke on girl!

I love it to hun

Wow. Amazing story of conversion. I can only wish to have a mentor in my life like you. Thanks for a clear description of what would be, otherwise, a difficult journey.

I love smoking too!

Brilliant!

So, how much does Your girlfriends smoke a day?

Im 100% with you!

i love yal girls keep smpken and please lady like syle

I am so glad that a girl you're age realizes how amazing being a cigarette smoker is! I have been smoking since I was 11 years old (almost 40 years) and I have loved every cigarette I have smoked. Smoking cigarettes is the best, most attractive thing anyone can do for themselves. Cigarettes taste so good, smell amazing and make everything around you smell amazing, make your lungs feel so good, gives your lungs everything they need to feel good, help you stay super skinny (which is soooooo important), make you look very very attractive, and sucking on a lit cigarette constantly throughout the day just makes life so much better. i am unlike you in that I smoke very heavily and I smoke strong cigarettes (marlboro red 100s) but this is just a personal preference and however makes you the most satisfied. I am also like you in how I like how cigarettes are so terrible for my health and lungs but I still happily suck down at least 3 packs a day. since i've been smoking heavily for so long I do have a constant smokers cough and I get very out of breath easily but that doesn't make me want to quit one bit! I don't want to have health problems from smoking, but I know it's a very good possibility and i'd rather die from smoking than anything else! I also love having everyone know I'm a cigarette smoker. I will keep my pack in a clear outside pocket in my purse and I love knowing everyone can see my strong, unhealthy cigarettes :) I love that you understand cigarettes importance in staying super skinny. being skinny is soooo important if you want a lot of boys to like you and being a smoker is the best way to stay thin. i have been anorexic since i was a teenager, i have always been thin as a rail, weighing less than 100lbs and I know I look really hot being this thin. Guys want girls with absolutely no fat on their bodies and smoking is the best way to do this. I also love that i always smell like a full ashtray because i smoke inside and when you smoke inside you and everything you own smells like cigarettes and nothing else so when i walk into a store or a restuarant or anywhere everyone can smell how much I smell like cigarettes and know how heavily I smoke. I can tell you that being a smoker only gets better with time, cigarettes taste even more amazing to me now, my lungs feel like heaven 24/7 from the constant smoking, and I have had so many years of enjoying everything about smoking cigarettes. I hope that you keep smoking for the rest of your life, being a smoker will make so many more boys want you, help you be anorexic, and so many more amazing things!

Couldn't have put it any better!

This was a response worthy of relying too. I once posted that I was addicted to smoking, yet was not a smoker anymore (at that time). I started smoking when I was very young and did so for years. I was in the military, and soon found myself getting more into working out; although I would have a cigarette now and then. I simply could not go without. After I retiring I had basically stopped, yet remained addicted. Smoking addiction is like alcoholism in that you may not have a drink, but you still have the cravings and desire. Then came along the internet and I discovered that a strong smoking fetish and capnolagnia. I loved the smoking damage aspects of smoking. Well a few years ago I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Many will question my sanity for what I am about to write, but when the diagnosis was made, I was sexually aroused. For a period of time I contemplated letting it go and not doing anything about it, but eventually I did take care of it. It was an eye opener though, because I could not get over the feeling I had when I was told I had it. To make a long story short, because of that, about two years ago I decided to start smoking again, and to smoke heavily. As I type this response, I have a Pall Mall non-filtered between my lips. I love all aspects of smoking, most only a smoker can appreciate. I have basically stopped working out and not am breathless after climbing a few stairs. I love the smell of a smoky area, and when I can get a smoking hotel room, I am in heaven. I too love the way the cigarette tastes and love to fill my lungs with smoke. Now I have not achieved the high levels of smoking as some; I am stuck at about a pack to a pack and half a day, but I am a SMOKER. As for weight thing, ah I don’t know it hasn’t made me lose any weight. Also, seeing a woman with some meat on her bones smoke rather nice. Beautiful on the outside, but dark and smoky on the inside, now that is beauty.

Nice story Laura, keep enjoying!

Hi Laura, love ur story and I see so much of myself in u! I love smoking so much and would love to talk to u more, could u provide me with a email address maybe? Thanks enjoy ur day!

I used to be really anti smoking, but now I dont really care. I dont smoke, but I like girls who smoke. I once wanted to write a paper supporting smoking (there are a lot of benefits as you noted) for a college class, but I already picked my topic. Maybe one day. I have thought of trying, and have smoked a few fake cigarettes, but I have never had a real good opportunity and am scared my friends and family will judge me badly. Cool story!

and **** all the smokers..you are damaging the society..and thats what made you feel sexyy?? haa isn't it ??? dammmm...btw you are not sexy..you are disgusting even not a girl..cuz girls are beautiful..shy..and somthing pretty...Never get it from a cigar Neverrrr !!

**** you !

Thanx a lot for your story !!!

they're just the type of things that fetishists think when we read a story about loving smoking :)

Your english is simple enough for me to understand it, as i'm not english speaker :)

Greetings from Spain, Laura :)

Laura, first of all: Your english is perfect :)

And great you also like smoking that much! You're really taking the words right out of my mouth with your story... esp regarding the first cig of the day. I always smoke my first in bed!

But what a shame you're not allowed to smoke at home. I used to live with my mom until I got married, she's a smoker too and has always been very laid back and supportive. I could smoke everywhere in the house... and believe me, I took the opportunity :)

How much you smoke on average?

Laura, This was a great story. I am glad you started smoking too. You sound like a perfect girl with your skinny body smoking deeply. You will find that your more attractive to a larger set on men. And you will keep your body sleek for a longer time.
I find watching smoking woman such turn on. I have learned that the way a woman smokes and the way they flick their ash says a lot about whether or not the woman likes you or not. I hope this holds true to you also.

How did u get a pack at 15! Why did they sell u them

Great story laura! Just keep enjoying that wonderfull smoke traveling in and out of your lungs. I have smoked for many years and so have most of my family and we don't have lung problems. Your english is very good and it was a great story.

What a great story Laura and you are exactly right on all fronts of the smoking spectrum. Please add and deep smoke!