Some Kind of Closure
I've poured a lot of myself into this particular group. Many people would think that it is counter-productive the way i write about all these intense feelings i have for him. That i will always have for him.
But it has really helped me. It's given me a place to leave my thoughts and feelings about Him so i could forget- for a minute, for an hour, for a week.
I can see my time here coming to a close soon though, as I've gained some of the closure that i have been desperately seeking.
Most of that is private (i know, here on EP something that is too private to share- i am shocked and amazed) but i sent him an email, talking to him about how he had been my best friend forever, and that i missed my best friend- a lot more than i ever missed my lover.
I got a good response, not that it changed anything- but it meant a lot to me to know that he understood more than i thought, and that he didnt blame me for.... things....
anyways- i have written a eff-ton of stories here, but i think that that will be slowing down.. at last.