Trying To Deal...

On April 1st, my Mom was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer with brain metastases. She had surgery to remove one of the brain tumors but there was another wrapped around her windpipe which is inoperable. She's been going for bi-weekly chemo treatments ever since, but the tumors continue to multiply.
We just found out last week that the cancer has metasticized (sp?) to her liver and another tumor is growing in her chest. She can barely eat or sleep and often says things that make no sense. It really scares me. I often feel like I am the only one in my family who is sufficiently worried about this. It seems like my siblings and my dad are in denial most of the time. I think it's strange that I am taking this so hard because my Mom and I were never close. We didn't get along very well at all while I was still living at home.
I'm sad because she will most likely not live to see me get married or have kids (unless I ran out and got married AND pregnant within the next couple months!) but whenever I mention those things my boyfriend thinks that I'm trying to pressure him.

I don't know...there's a lot of things I'm confused about right now.
shakesomeaction shakesomeaction
26-30
1 Response Jul 23, 2010

I know how you feel,I've been there with my Dad.You have to understand that when she says things that don't make sense to you,it is a combination of her disease and the powerful drugs to fight her pain.I wasn't as close to my dad as I wanted to be either.It was a combination of a hard headed boy and a man who had to work a lot to support his family.No doubt when you say no one in your family seems as concerned as you,it's your feelings of guilt sweetheart.Please don't think I'm chastising you<br />
dear,because I'm not.I believe I have been where you are now I want to give you some advice to help you for the rest of your life.Time is probably short.Talk to her and tell her you love her,and appoligize if<br />
you feel you need to.Ask her what kind of person she would like you to be.She will probably tell you she made mistakes too.Get close to her,it will bring you comfort for the rest of your life.DON'T MISS THIS OPPORTUNITY!!!