My Mom

My mom used to hoard animals and things. It was a strange way to grow up surrounded by the filth from the animals and the garbage she collected. I used to get angry with her because I didn't understand why she forced all of us to live in those conditions....I still don't understand but I'm no longer angry about it. She's been better for quite a few years now after being forced to move out of the home we lived in while I was growing up and I drove out to watch the workers for awhile before it was torn down. It felt a bit surreal seeing them with masks and gloves on just to walk around the place I used to eat and sleep every day. I laughed about that with my brothers and sisters, from our perspective it was impossible not to see the humor in the situation, but it was also slightly disturbing.

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36-40, F
4 Responses Feb 27, 2010

my mom is a hoarder too. i'm sorry you went through this.

My mum is a compulsive hoarder and i feel exactly the same, i don't understand how she allows us to live in these conditions and not do anything about it! I feel like i've lost part of my life really because i can never get my childhood back and all i remember of it was constantly having to try and avoid having people around or knowing where i live, it is still the same!

That's a feeling I can relate to. When talking to people I often find that without consciously thinking about it I choose to present either entirely one side of what my life has been like or the other. It's not so much that I'm secretive about it but the two are already very separate in my mind and it's hard enough trying to reconcile both to myself, let alone possibly explaining to someone else.

It is very strange to think about. For me the discrepancy between the physical conditions we lived in and our pretty well normal, healthy family life makes it almost seem as if I had two childhoods....in a way.