Ahh!!!

i HATE riding the bus!!

i've been riding this god damned thing for the past 12 years! andi'm only 22!!

it smells like **** and **** combined with 5 year old dirty socks. and i'm sick of the creepy who always stares at me and the man who smells like *** aways sitting next to me - o and even better when he has no sense of personal space!

agh!!!

a few months ago i was able to upgrade a little bit to a vespa but with that in the shop for the next two weeks i get to ride the loser crusier two times a day, five days a week.

being so frustrated with always feeling like half an adult with no real mode of transportation, i started to look at cars. but of course, god still has it out for me. i won't be able to afford one for the next year and a half IF i'm lucky and save my *** off meaning i'll have no money for myself in the mean time.

then with that i start getting even more frustrated. here i am 22, have been on my own since i was 17, i'm trying my damnedest to make a decent life for myself, i try to be as honest and kind as i can be, and i CAN'T CATCH A BREAK! working from one god damned paycheck to another, trying to educate myself and get a damn degree, working with people twice my age-which makes me feel twice my age, making it hard to get along/understand with people my own age because most of whom don't know how to work hard to get nice things and aren't familar with the concept of responsibility. AND that alone infuriates me because why do i have to live like this, why can't i get drunk ad sleep until noon (cause lord knows i haven't woken up past 8 in 3 years). why don't i have parents that support me while i get through school (instead i have the lunatic mother who loves to disown every other week). why do i have to worry so god damn much about getting the rent to the landlord who lives 5 miles away (with no transportation)!!! WHY CAN'T I BE A REGULAR 22 YEAR OLD??!?

yeah yeah,that's just how life is. i've heard that way too many time before and if i hear it one more time i will tear my ears out!!

**** **** ****. AGH!!!!!

msbogart msbogart
22-25, F
1 Response Mar 3, 2009

Sounds like you are going through a hard time and you just need to stop the world and take a nice deep breath <br />
<br />
I did the same thing you did and it was hard very hard <br />
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my mother was like yours and always disowning me and making me feel belittled by lies. just keep doing what your doing and good things will come. they did for me anyways, i am very happy, married to my best friend, 2 dogs, house with a pool, and a little one on the way. i totally believe good things happen to good people that work hard. i also believe that anything good is never easy. <br />
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cheers