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The Devil Made Me Do It..

Once upon a time there lived a king.


The king had a beautiful daughter, the PRINCESS.

But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.

No matter what:

metal,

wood,

stone,

everything she touched

would melt.

Because of this, men were afraid of her.

Nobody would dare marry her.

The king despaired.

What could he do to help his daughter?

He consulted his wizards and magicians.

One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured."

The king was overjoyed and came up with a plan.

The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth.

THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE.

The first brought a sword of the finest steel.

But alas, when the princess touched it, it melted.

The prince went away sadly .

The second prince brought diamonds.

He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would not melt.

But alas, once the princess touched them, they melted.

He too was sent away disappointed.

The third prince approached. He told the princess,

"Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there."

The princess did as she was told, though she turned red .

She felt something hard. She held it in her hand.

And it did not melt!!!

The king was overjoyed.. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed!

The third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.

Question: What was in the prince's pants?

(Scroll down for the answer)

 

 

 

M&M's of course.

They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.


What were you thinking??

sharossody sharossody 70+, F 10 Responses Dec 9, 2009

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Timely Word 4 Today

Within Limits

Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. —2 Corinthians 12:8–9

When you put your faith in Jesus Christ, a sign is effectively hung around your neck that says, “Under new management.” You now belong to Jesus Christ, and He does not operate on a timeshare program.

Isn’t that nice to know? He doesn’t say, “Okay, now I have Greg for six months, and the devil can have him for the next six months.” That is not what happens. When we put our faith in Christ, He comes in and is the sole resident in our hearts and lives.

Although a Christian cannot be demon-possessed, the devil can affect a Christian outwardly. For instance, demons can tempt and oppress a Christian. The apostle Paul wrote, “And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure” (2 Corinthians 12:7). The word “buffet” means to hit in the face.

So Paul was essentially saying, “Yes, I have come under some demon attack. But here is the good news: God will never give you more than you can handle.”

The Bible tells us in James 2:19, “You believe that there is one God. You do well. Even the demons believe—and tremble!” Of course, just because you believe something is true doesn’t mean you have committed yourself to it. Obviously, demons are in rebellion against God.

Paul’s oppression was allowed by God and orchestrated by Satan. So God may allow the devil to tempt you or harass you in some way. But remember, He won’t give you more than you can take. The only thing that will stop the devil is the power of Jesus Christ. He is our only protection. He is the one we need.

Copyright © 2011 by Harvest Ministries. All rights reserved.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

For more relevant and biblical teaching from Pastor Greg Laurie, go to www.harvest.org
and
Listen to Greg Laurie's daily broadcast on OnePlace.com.

Watch Greg Laurie's weekly television broadcast on LightSource.com.

Actually, I enjoyed the story more because it reminded me of a nasty joke story that Sir Garwin told me once about Lancelot while I was working in Camelot 1400 years ago as Merlin's assistant ( despite what people think now, Lancy was an *** that we all hated and loved to insult. You've heard of the Frog Prince? Well, we used to call him The Frog *****. He made Fabio look like a wallflower..)<br />
Anyway, it came to pass that King Arthur decided that he needed to go north to fight Pirates that had been attacking ships coming south (Actually, that was false. He Really was heading there because he had heard that Lady Vivian''s house of VERY ill-repute was having a discount sale for anyone with a uh.."magic sword' and Arty never could resist a good sale..or Lady Vivian's girls. There were no pirates..except for the Scottish dock workers on strike. Yeah you never heard about that ether, did you? Like everything else with Camelot, it all got cleaned up in the end ..Amazing what you could do with Merlin as a PR man)<br />
<br />
Anyway..<br />
<br />
Arthur worried greatly about Guinevere .Like Lancelot, what we've been told about her has been VERY cleaned up. Guin was friendly to Arthur's knights. VERY friendly. In fact, she was friendly to anyone in pants (Kilts weren't invented or wore by any Scotsman until almost 700 years later. Poor fools.. They never DID realize it was just a joke. I'm going to burn in Hell someday for starting that, but I REALLY didn't think anyone would be foolish enough to fall for such a stupid joke for so long..Silly me..)<br />
So, Arthur was worried and Guinevere was looking a little too good (and eager ) for Arthur to trust her at that time . She had begged Arthur to not be taken along since she hated traveling (despite often talking about going around the world), and considering what Arthur was going to be doing up North, he agreed (All those nasty pirates, you know)<br />
So, as he had done many times with a problem he couldn't solve, Arthur called Merlin (I wasn't there at the time. I was up North looking around. Couldn't leave. Pirates, you know..)<br />
Now, Arthur and Merlin were a bit more cold-blooded then people think of them now, and Arthur was over-joyed at Merlin's idea; The first Chasity belt. But not just a belt to block anything from going in, but one to cut off anything going in. Like the blades that removed upper classmen from their heads later in France, the blade would fall and remove their ''manhood" from the men's bodies.<br />
Arthur was delighted. No nasty surprises in 9 months, and singers who could reach higher notes assured. And Arthur then left for 2 months.<br />
I wish I could tell you of the great deeds and brave battles that Arthur won while fighting the pirates, and the pain and sufferings caused by Arthur, but the ''battles actually ..uh, ''won'' by Arthur are STILL being protected by Merlin's PR program and my pinky finger just turned black even thinking about writing his true adventures up North, so forgive me if I decline to do so..And judging by what Arthur found when he got home, most of the screams of pain and sufferings were happening in Camelot while he was gone<br />
So Arthur was home, and couldn't resist seeing if any of his knights had fallen for the trap he and Merlin had set. Arthur ordered all his knights to stand in front of him and drop the bottom halves of thier armour.. and anything underneath.. Came the sound of a great crash of iron that filled the hallways of Camelot, replaced only by the scream of anguish when Arthur saw that ALL the knights could now sing some VERY high tunes.. All, except for lancealot.<br />
Ordering all his knights to dress themselves again and report to Merlin for actions so that there would be more people to tax later on (Merlin made a mint, even charging a group rate), Arthur went up to Lancelot and proclaimed loudly:<br />
''You have insulted him. You have joked about him with your cruel words and jests. But as you can see, he was the one man, of all of you here, who kept his honor, his vows, and his loyalty to his king. Thank you , my tried and true knight"<br />
And Lancelot smile and bowed..<br />
<br />
But was speechless..

question here! why did the princess go red?

Another good one.

hehehehehehehehe you're good!

You naughtyyyy...! LOL

daniel I'm shocked...lol<br />
<br />
lucie... like kat.. it is not what your thinking is it??

That's great! Talk about a surprise ending!

woman looking in the mirror says to her husband i would like bigger boobs so he says how much will it cost about 10,000 so he says what ,go to the store and get toilet paper, and rub your boobs with it .she she says will it work.so he says yes ,it work with your ***.ha,ha.

What was I thinking? Why M& Ms of course. yeah uh, yeah.. of course... (Stop giggling..)<br />
<br />
Thanks for the joke..<br />
<br />
Oh stop giggling!