At This Point...

It's what's expected of me. I might as well give the people what they want.

drcynic drcynic
26-30, M
10 Responses Feb 24, 2009

I'm a very good liar... I conned hotel rooms when I was homeless. :P

Being the funny one all the time is very tiring. I used to be the same way. One day my friends realized I had problems too and being the life of the party meant hiding those problems. Some of them did not know how to deal the the real me. The one who was overly emotional and sensitive. I had to find a balance between the two. Putting on an act constantly is not healthy. It can make you really good at lying.

Green

what's your favorite color?

I get it, lol.

Never be who you are expected to be...**** them and be yourself! They don't like it, they can suck your...well you get the point...lol!

It is the wonderful person indeed who wishes to know the facets of who I am.

I know that feeling. In elementary/middle school I was painfully shy and had a lot insecurities. When I got to high school I was determined not to be the loner anymore. So I became the funny care free girl. You know the one who would never turn down a dare and say anything. It carried on to college. I was the one to never say no to a drink or a party. When my friends and I go out I'm the crazy one in the group and it's my job to make sure we have fun. But being constantly on show has made me feel like I haven't made any true connections with people in my life. I'm expected to be the fun crazy one and when I'm not they don't know how to relate to me. Now that I'm trying to cut down on drinking and the craziness it's seems the people I thought were my friends have no use for me. Ehhh I guess that long winded story was my way of saying don't let being the funny guy overshadow other parts of your personality. Let people see all of you not just one side.

It is... I make a joke to hide a tear, and eventually people just expected me to make them laugh. The fact that I make my career doing that, notwithstanding.

Why is it expected? Is it just in your nature?