Sexless Marriage

I don't understand how a person could say he loves you and you know he does but when we were dating he couldn't keep his hands off me and we would make love for hours and at the end I would be so sore I could hardly walk right! And now we are married and have been for 21yrs. and 3-children later he doesn't even kiss me passionately and we've only had sex twice in one year and the sex seem like he wanted to hurry up! He got off and I was left empty! How can I get him to make love to me the way he use too?

rena45 rena45
41-45
4 Responses Feb 13, 2009

As a 58 year old man, I have never lost the desire for sex. There have, however been several periods in my marriage when sex has been lacking. Unfortunately, when my wife hit menapause, her vagina got dry and painful and we no longer have sex at all, but earlier, the lack of sex was also generally because she didn't want it. I can't speak for all men, but I think most men want passionate sex as much as you do. You must consider that he may be getting his needs met somewhere else. However, it is just as likely that he just doesn't see the playful sex partner that he had before children made life more complicated. Maybe you should do something unexpected - like playfully getting on your knees in front of him, undoing his pants, and giving him what every man loves. Once you have his juices flowing, tell him he has to give you what you want to.

Have you told him how you feel? Been married for 47 years and have learned that without direct communication, things "don't just happen because I wish they would. I have to make my feelings and needs known.

Have you told him how you feel? Been married for 47 years and have learned that without direct communication, things "don't just happen because I wish they would. I have to make my feelings and needs known.

Have you told him how you feel? Been married for 47 years and have learned that without direct communication, things "don't just happen because I wish they would. I have to make my feelings and needs known.