I am a straight male who has been cross dressing since I was about 10 years of age.  I Have no idea what started it.  However, I recollect being told off by one of my school teachers, do you want to wear her dress?.  This was because, I was immediately behind a girl in a queue &  was touching her dress. I was 6 or 7 years of age at the time.

I remember at a later date, everyone being out of the house.  For what ever reason, I felt compelled to put on one of my sisters skirts. It felt heavenly, I was hooked. This was a life changing moment. There was no turning back.  How could there be?  From that point I lived a typically male life. Drank in the pub with mates, watched my beloved Manchester United play football, had girlfriends & eventually got married.  My urge to cross dress, however, was as strong as ever.  One particular day, my wife was out with friends & I decided to dress up in her clothes ( I had never bought my own at that point ) She arrived home early & caught me dressed up.  Needless to say, it was a horrible moment for both of us.  I tried to pretend that it was a one off.  That I was trying to be close to her.  She did not believe me. 

 Our marriage lasted a further 5 years.  It eventually ended in divorce.  It was probably the best thing that could have happened.  It was not a particularly happy marriage, I should have married another girl. " that's another story".

It's taken many years, but I have finally accepted myself.  I cross dress & cannot stop. Albeit, in private.  I feel guilty & deceitful, but why? I am what I am. Ironically, I think it has made me a better person. 



Viktoryia Viktoryia
51-55, M
8 Responses Feb 7, 2010

Hm... yes, i felt in a same way... first i felt guilty, after many years, i accept myself. And, yes i think it made me better person. But sometime, i feel a little sadness, to maybe i didn't find a woman who accept me... but i try to belie its only my pessimism...

Thanks Honeypot. It's nice to have so many friends here.

you are definitely not alone in both your dressing and your feelings good luck in all that you do<br />
xoxo honey

Hi Marcie & Vickybelle<br />
<br />
Thank you for your support. It's nice to know that I am not alone.<br />
<br />
Regards<br />
<br />
<br />

Hi Viktoryia.<br />
<br />
At age 15 I tried one of my mother's panties. It was an incredible feeling which got me immediately hooked and going non-stop, notwithstanding the guilt I experienced after each stint.<br />
<br />
To make a long story short, I kept on it during approximately 45 years, with my wife's knowledge and half-hearted acquiescence. But the guilty feeling wouldn't fade.<br />
<br />
While browsing through the web around mid-June 2007 I found information which led me to learn I wasn't alone nor a freak and that, according to various surveys, approximately 5 to 10% of straight males in western countries regularly indulge in this practice or, at least, have tried it once.<br />
<br />
That definitely did away with this very nagging guilt complex and I started really enjoying something which is a real blessing. Think about it: Being capable of really feeling fond of what you're wearing close to your body or looking at yourself in the mirror and really enjoying the view!<br />
<br />
Regards, Vickybelle

Dearest Victoryia:<br />
<br />
I am a life long crossdresser myself. and I can only say you should never feel guilty or deceitful for doing what you love to. you should embrace it linger and relish with in its boundrys.<br />
<br />
any support I can give to you just ask.<br />
<br />
hugs and kisses<br />
<br />
Marcie L

I have crossdressed for over 40 years, and have no regreats.

You know it's funny that when we were young that there was some one<br />
would say something about your eyes or hair that you should be a girl.<br />
And then it get's you thinking hey ! I wounder what I would look like if<br />
I was a girl . <br />
<br />
Well what can I say it was the end of the beging .