A Vivid ImaginationMy entire life I have always been a loner. I was generally the target everyone liked to pick on. So it is no surprise that I developed the ability to have a vivid imagination at such a young age. You learn how to escape reality when reality sucks. I guess it made life bearable... even if now it makes me pathetic.
I have been noticing that once I got my Dakimakuras I have been feeling more attached to them. All the cuddling I used to do with my ex has transferred over to them. When I hold them and lie on them. Well I feel safe and happy. When I am down the act of holding them perks me back up and makes me enjoy life a little. Wow I have really become pathetic right?
I guess I could say this feels like I have already given up on having another girl in my if I am able to so easily pretend these pillows are real. I wonder if that is sad or not. I mean I could be one of those people who endlessly cries about having no one. At least I can pretend and it is almost the same thing. I have been noticing that about other facets of my life as well. I wonder what it all means. Maybe I am meant to die alone in obscurity. It is not like I am a girl who can run around innocently cuddling whoever I want. Well I could but then I would be seen as creepy and pathetic. Ah I love some of our double standards.