So Needed

I hate being ignored in the family and most of the time over looked if I'm not me. Loud, funny, or intelligent. I hate but glad I'm ignored I'm glad that my family can focus on them and others who may need it in the family. I care for others more than myself and I hate it. My major way of getting attention is me crying because I don't do it often because I try and hide all my bad emotions from them. I have smarter cousins in school so they get a good amount. my younger brother, sister, older brother all have medical issue also. My older cousins get attention because they were the first born with my older brother. The only one close to my feeling is my cousin who is two years older but she still gets attention because of the sports she does. So I cry for that moment when I can't take the fake smiling the pain the over looking the stress of listening to my sister constantly talking. Don't get me wrong I love them to death but we all have flaws dammit. After 20 minutes I stop listening. My younger brother constantly trying to break me down. I cry because it relases it all. I actually just starting crying at a happy time with my family. I couldnt handle everything and i just couldn't take it. I cry and cry because if my crying can replace someone else I'll do it. In a heartbeat especially if your my friend. Thank you for listening. :)
Awt33356 Awt33356
18-21, M
Sep 8, 2012