Why I Like Ep

Warning to those who read this. I do not reread what I write, it is raw and pure and straight from the head to the fingers on the keyboard. There may be mis spelled and/or mistyped words. If you are a fanatic about grammer, this will probably upset you..... you have been warned.

As of this writing I have been on EP about a month and in making friends on here and chatting with people, I have realized something about myself.

I enjoy and am good at manipulating people with my words and imagination.

In the "real" world society has rules around what you can say and feel and not say and feel. If you are honest with your thoughts, you can get crucified by your peers, spouse, significant other, parents, teachers, and the list goes on and on. If you ask an inappropriate question at an inappropriate time, you are branded. If you are not covering your a$$ all the time, you are put into a category. If you follow a desire that makes you happy for the moment, you are labeled. If you make an error in judgement as a young individual, you are outcast. If you are not happy in your relationship, and you try to even think about changing it, everyone comes down on you. If you strive to be 100% happy in your life, people are envious and knock you down, just because their lives are miserable. Even to the point where you need to hide your inner self, because you know that your SO feels that that is too kinky or perverted to even try. So, you keep all of these things in side of you.

However, on EP, you can let your imagination out and play. Sure, some people feel the need to be shallow and perverted and get their kicks from being an undesirable, especially to the ladies on here. But their cover is blown quickly, because they don't know how to deal with their own thoughts and words.

I myself know that I am much much different. I am not a shallow person, and I do think at length about others and put myself into their own position and try and look at it from their eyes. I let my imagination run free, with no regrets or restrictions, knowing that I will feel absolutely horrible if I destroy someone. I feel that I have a very powerful imagination with what i have dealt with in my life, and I have the knack of being able to choose the right words for the right people. I know I can destroy someone's fragile self esteem very very easily with my words. However, that is the easy thing to do, that is not a challenge to me. That is like if I were in on the track team in high school, and I challenge a first grader to a race. Sure, we start out as equals, but I know I will blow them away. That is not fun for me.

I like to challenge myself, so I search out genuine people who have a genuine past, and a genuine reason for being here. I search these people out and chat with them and become fiends with them, and can't help by get into their minds to see how I can help them or change them for the better in some way. I get my happiness knowing that I can do this for them and make them smile.

I can do this with anyone, regardless of if I believe and support their values. I don't judge anyone and that allows me to transform myself into their own mindset to understand what and why they are thinking. Then I take a step back and analyze based on my history and interactions and find a solution and am able to articulate that solution with my words. All my life I've been a problem solver, and even now at my work, I am the problem solver that people go to. I go into meetings and all I hear is how something can not be done, and I just say that .... Yes, there is a solution to this. Immediately people want to know what the solution is. I just let them know, that I don't know the solution yet... but I know I will think of one and to just let me leave with my imagination and I will not only come up with the solution, but build the solution to prove that it works.... then.... I will tell you how I did it. I know I can think. that may sound , confident, arrogant or positive, or whatever word you need to bound it to. I just know that I can do it.

On EP, wonderful people are open to hearing a solution, and if they don't like it they move on, and there are no lingering labels put on you. People on EP will take my thoughtfulness and actually think about it. I can't even get my wife and kids to think about my solutions, because they don't understand the level that I go in before I speak. To them, I am always wrong. The only light there is my daughter, who does digest what I say, and think about it knowing that I always have the best intentions, and will start to see what I am saying.

I choose to use the word "playing" on EP, because I get a great feeling from my conversations. My heart beats a little faster, my brain starts to hurt, my blood is flying through my body.... I am alive!!! Proving that I am more than what I can do physically, because of that nasty age monster that keeps coming at you... nothing can touch my imagination and the way that it can jump around from sad to happy, from sincere to playful, from thoughtful to kicking someone's *** in order to wake them up. My imagination changes gears in a moments notice to keep me and my friends on their toes, and have that feeling of life flooding your veins. Making you feel good that you are alive.

I also realize that I may be too much at times and exert too much energy and that my friends may not be able to deal with it at the time and I need to back off. That is something that I need to work on. Not allowing my imagination to consume the conversation and take over and make the other person weak. The greater competition is to use my imagination to push that person higher to where they never thought they would go, and get them to a level where they are absolutely blown away with excitement.

I have met some of the most fascinating people on here, with the most fascinating stories, and I learn about them and about me as well. I have a friend on her that has opened a door in my mind that I have kept closed because I was afraid that it was too "kinky" to let out. It has peeked out in the past, and taken over sometimes in my dating years, and as I got the thrill from it, I was also labeled and destroyed for it. I am just scratching the surface of our relationship, but it is not based on love, nor will it ever be. We both hold our real world families in too high a regard to change that. However, the more we know about each other the more the mindf**k will develop. She and I are both strong willed, and banter about as if two predators are sizing up the other and evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of our opponent. I know I will win, and she knows that she will win, so around and around we start to go as if we were two of the same kind and this is our mating dance. I guess that would be a mating dance, but not of love, but of lust and power and imagination.

I have another friend on here that needs to be stroked every once in a while to feel loved and cared for. With a few chosen words and thoughts I can have her laughing hysterically and make her smile. Just seeing her EP name come up with the green triangle puts a smirk on my face knowing in a few moments that I will have her smiling, no matter what her day has been like. She knows that I am honest and true, and am not looking to change my real life world as I have told her up front, but that doesn't stop her from allowing me in to make her happy without repercussions.

Another friend seems to have been the whipping post of life and has been controlled for evil purposes her entire life, and is trapped in a place where she has nobody to save her. Everyone has turned their back on this young woman, and physically there is nothing I can do about it. So, I tip toe around trying to build her confidence, but can't do that too fast as if she does get bold, and stand up for herself, she will be left out with nothing, and I can not help her as much as I would like to physically. So, I do all I can to raise her spirits and make her laugh and build her confidence at an agonizing slow pace so that she can become stronger and stand on her own two feet, and hopefully one day flourish to be the butterfly that I see inside of her.

I have a young friend on here that I need to be very careful of the line that I come to. My kids are her age, so I understand where she is coming from and as much of an age difference as there is, I can jerk her around and make her roll on the floor laughing and build her confidence in herself, without crossing the line that would classify me as a pervert. She knows I will not go there, and she respects that. However, she does take in my advice and think about it, and does allow me to enter her world and make her a better person.

There is also a very special friend that was one of my first friends here on EP, and she opened up like a flower to me, allowing me to see the beauty inside of her. She has made some desperate decisions earlier in life that got her caught up in things that society frowns upon. However, she did this to survive. She locked away her own feelings for three full years in order to make her own life better on the outside. I admire that and to some extent I understand that as I had put my own life on hold because I needed to do what I had to do in order to turn my life around. This intelligent young lady, and I do mean lady in every sense of the word, is now reinventing herself in a new environment with new choices. She has these choices now because she sacrificed herself earlier in life. Every time I interact with this fascinating woman she never fails to impress me with her insight into herself and others as she learns as she lives. It has made me a better person for knowing her.

There are other stories from my new friends from all over the world that have their own problems and issues because of parents dis owning them because of their beliefs, and how they get through life in the society that they live in dictates that things are done a certain way, or you are labeled as unwanted. There are so many of these individuals out there who need me to come play with them and and help them make their day just a little bit brighter, and I LOVE THAT!!!

In real life, I am a coach of competitive youth sports teams that I don't have any family investment in. I choose to coach young girls in order to build their confidence to take on the real world. I have already seen the impact that I have made with them and parents are always saying nice things to me for helping their little girl feel good about her self. So, I know I can manipulate little minds that are just growing into something positive.

Now, I am gaining the confidence in myself that I can do that on a much larger scale, and with adult lives who have been jaded with life's unpleasantness. I am genuinely grateful to all of the people that I have met here and allowed me to get in with them, and allowed me to become stronger with them, and allowed me to open doors to my own mind in order to take me to places I've dared not yet to go. Including challenging me to use my imagination in order to control them with my new found power in order to push them higher and into places where they feel exhilarated to be alive.

Thank you to all my friends and thank you to EP for giving me the environment to excel at what I am good at without real life repercussions that the outside world would not look favorably on.
emoenjr emoenjr
46-50, M
10 Responses Jan 15, 2013

Its the trick of the trade!

I have read this and want you to know ... I feel very inspired by your words. I too try to help and take seriously the problems many in here face. I find it so difficult to read sarcastic responses to someone who is suicidal receiving a response like... "let me know what it feels like. I might want to smoke that too."
I see this and want to crash their world. Here is someone crying for help and you have to make a joke of it.
Please please keep yourself moving forward and provide even a shadow of joy to those who need it.
You are an inspiration. -Carla

Thank you very much Carla, and it sounds like you and I would be good friends. Add me if you are interested.

Its really a straight from heart post :)

Thank you

Beautifully written :)

Thanks

I love this...using a gift you've received to serve others is a beautiful thing. ;)

Thank you very much!!

Good

Thanks!

I enjoyed reading that. Thank you.

Awesome, thank you.

What a great story!! It seemed so honest, genuine and very solid. I'm glad that you take so much pride in yourself and your friends at EP. I'm really glad that it's working out for you as well :)

Thank you, and I value every friend that I have on and off of EP!!

:)

Very good, you are a kind person and very helpful :)

Thank you very much.

absolutely beautiful!
makes me grateful that there are still some genuine people out there.
i must say your daughter is very lucky to have someone like you.

Thank you very much!!!