Only Those That Live And Love In The Blue Know........

The thing I look forward to is my little blue candy. I find them in the bottom of my purse. I find them broken in half on my night stand. I find them in jewlery boxes, coat pockets.
I love the way they taste, and my mouth waters profusely when I put one on my moist lower lip.
In order to be around my family (I am now 30) I have to eat these little candies at least every hour or so. Until I can smile and chat these strangers that raised me for a little while. I wear sunglasses into the store..and I make friends quite easily. When I have eaten one or two. I like the way that the world slows down; I pull a box from my purse; it contains cigarettes and a ciggarette holder. I use my gold lighter and light up a long ciggarette and drag on it like a French actor. People tell me that I move about so elegantly; that I carry myself romantically; that my dresses and mary jane shoes and wool beret with the pea coat are timeless. I am a living doll. With painted red lips,a drawn on beauty mark and pin curls. I am loaded to the hilt; and I drink double Jameson's in a bucket glass. I speak like Marilyn Monroe. This is the best feeling in the world. To move about, to lower my sunglasses to a victim and have a sweet smile beneath cat eyes and fake lashes..I can make a stranger stare; smile and blush. Having a married man, hold a door open for a living doll; and be yelled at by his wife. When I become upset on good wine, when I feel overwhelmed; I scream and cry like a lost child. My lover, shakes the bottle like a baby rattle. I take the dose, and sip at water thru the tears. I weep and he carries me to the sofa. He brings me a blanket, I lay my head in his lap he rubs my hair and I wait for the calm. For the ocean waves to come; the tide that floods into my mind. I close my eyes, and feel the sweet warmth of my blue candies. I stand up, and sashay into the bedroom, finding something silk, sit at the boudoir and rub cold cream onto the doll's face. I wipe it off. I brush my hair, and spray something sweet onto my skin. I climb into bed. Everything, is right and perfect in my fractured world. With my blues. In my blues. On my blues. I am beautiful, complecated and fragile. I kiss for hours, and fall into my ideal world; that place my mind goes while the rest of the world is sleeping.
TheLivingDoll TheLivingDoll
31-35, F
2 Responses Dec 13, 2012

This is beautiful

I the lIfe of this trike yellow dot...the blues of four survey and direct the lost but happy...lost but safe.....complete but completely destroyed...entombed incomplete rapture...believe such yellow dot captions...living through stained glass broken mirror moments...yellow doubles and blue bubbles...i like you in these glasses...i got them from the blattons...a trade of love and style...a wink of an eye...a flick if my finger...I'm off to another yellow dot adventure.......