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Being Hurt

Hello all my name is barry.

I am a 18 year old male, i am here to tell you all a story of all the pain i have gone through in my life with relationships, first it all started with my first love lita we dated for a year before she told me that she has been cheating on me, i was heart broken cause the total of times she said she did it was just sad, i was single for a couple more years before i met my ex gf sammie, it all was going good till i caught her sleeping with my best friend austin i was so pissed that i just walked out smashing things in the way out, i have never been a violet kind of guy and never have been, so far i am with my current gf i do not know if she is cheating on me or not seeing how we never talk much, i only just heard from her today and it hurts me that she has better things to do then talk to me.....i just want a girl i can see everyday and talk to everyday but i am just bound to being hurt....

have a great day bye
hugsyx hugsyx 18-21, M 3 Responses Feb 18, 2013

Your Response


My heart goes out to the younger generation of today. When I was your age marriage was still expected in a romantic relationship and you looked for someone you thought was going to be a good lifelong partner and a good parent. I think it was easier for us back then to discern peoples' character. Also, it helped to be church going Christians as fidelity and chastity are important virtues in those communities and you socialised with other young people who had the same values. Whatever your situation is, I think it would be helpful for you to do some assertiveness training and to reflect more on character and responsibility in your prospective girlfriends.

Look into counseling. I've had plenty and it will help you to determine the difference between your wants and needs when looking for a relationship. You will also learn social skills, boundaries, and build your self-esteem, something we all need to do. I have had counseling on and off for years. I was a single mom and it was rough, however, all the work paid off and I met the man of my dreams. We've now been together going on 9 years. He takes good care of me, understands me and I him. We are a great couple. I'm tellin' ya, counseling! Oh and lots of prayer. :)

Try find find what empowers you without doing any of the things you know to hurt people. It may be very difficult and you will cry much of the time, but it will be a different sort of cry than the one you make when feeling pain.

Always remember that you are:
1. Helped
2. Important
3. Free
4. Confident
5. Motivated
6. In the Company of Others