The Story Of My Life
When I was 14 I had a huge crush on a much older male friend but I was too scared to tell anyone. This guy was a player. He lived with his girlfriend but was sleeping with several other women on the side. Eventually I found out that I was his 'target'; he knew that I was still a virgin and wanted to be my first so he could say that he took a girl's virginity. That really hurt me. Then when I was 19 I began sleeping with someone and I quickly fell in love with him. He was nothing, and I mean nothing like what I was looking for in a man but at that point I was just so lonely that I would have taken virtually anyone. After about 6 months or so of us sleeping together he told me that another girl he was sleeping with was pregnant. I had no idea that he was sleeping with anyone else. When I confronted him about it he told me that he didn't know what I thought this was, but to him it was just sex. Eventually he did become my boyfriend and we were together for a long time, but I never got over that so our relationship was doomed from the beginning. Now something similar is happening, but not quite the same. I became friends with a really great guy and I developed feelings for him. I decided to take a chance and tell him how I feel but he rejected me. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. I really don't deserve him anyway. I try to stay positive that I'll find the right guy eventually, I just get discouraged.