First Know The Drill

I thought i might share the WORST experience i've ever been through. It completely changed my life and got me to find EP.

I fell in love with a girl from college. We shared the same classes, so i'd often see her. We were in the same group of friends, though we didn't talked to each other much. I'd try to talk to her, but i always ended up failing at keeping the conversation. So it was more of a distant admiration.

One day i decided to declare myself to her. Let her know my true feelings. I even bought a gift to give to her before the actual confession. Everything went as good as planned, until she told me that she had a boyfriend. The words just stroke me like a flaming arrow. No joke, i actually felt a warm wave inside my body.

Needless to say, i was devastaded. And silly as i am, i didn't give up on her, even though she was in a happy relationship.

For weeks, i tried to convince her to be with me. I said sweet words, made romantic cards. I tried everything to make her realize how much i'd give for her. Didn't work.

Eventually i realized i wasn't going to get anywhere. As hard as i tried, she didn't want me. I talked to her so we could put an end to all the awkwardness. It was the right thing to do.

It's only been two months since i gave up trying. I don't chase her anymore, but i'm not over her. I still think about her. No other girl gets me interested. I feel depressed, angry, i don't sleep or eat well. And i dream about her once or twice a week. It's like i'm trying to forget her, but my mind won't let me.

She's engaged now, which doesn't help me get better. Ever since this happened, my life turned upside down. My dreams, my hopes, my objectives, all changed. Sometimes it feels like i'm living somebody else's life. It's a nightmare, and i can't wake up.

PS: Sorry for the long text
ImmaSlender ImmaSlender
22-25, M
2 Responses Nov 25, 2012

This reminds me of something I'm currently going through.

That's love it's stupid. I'm going through the same thing :(