Its Always Me...

Its always me people run to with their dramatic tales of romances that have gone sour. Its always me consoling my friends and imparting advice on the sensitive topic of love. Apparently, I hold the key to Cupid's secrets. In reality, I've never had a boyfriend. I am possibly the most unqualified person in this area. So dishing out the love advice when your queen of single town can verge on depressing. I'm everyones friend. I love when people need me. I relish the fact that people rely on me to help them with thier problems. Everyone, males included, view me as "thier good friend". So, maybe thats the reason I'm totally unlucky in love. I have liked 3 boys in my time. By like I mean, have substancial feeling for. Not just a crush if you will. Each of them meant so much to me. But to them I was just another pal. One boy in particular, who shall remain nameless, literally had my heart for 3 years. I would have done anything to b with him. So, one very brave night I revealed my feelings for him. Something I have never done and certainly something I don't plan on doing anytime soon. His exact words were and I quote "I think you're really nice". Firstly, we've been given a rather extensive vocabularly. Nice is the word you use to describe your Nans curtains. Its a non word. An effortless word of nothingness. And then of course came the "but". The dreaded but. He told me he couldn't be bothered with a relationship. So, as you can gather, he was quite the charmer. NOT. But then at a later date he decided to take my best friend out on a date. She was someone he could be bothered with. But thats a whole other story. Anyway, whether your 15 or 50, rejection hurts. In my case it felt like I'd been hit by a train. I can laugh about it now but at the time it severely affected my already low self-esteem and my confidence, which was non-existent. But in a way, I was proud of myself. I was able to be open about my feelings. Say what I really thought. Although it didn't go my way at least I know exactly what that idiot was truly like. I saw his true colours. So, every cloud does have its silver lining, granted at times it may be tiny a tiny lining. In all seriousness though, telling someone you love them and not hearing it back is hard. Like, knife in the heart hard. My advice would be to make sure your both on that level and tread carefully. Very carefully. Your heart is precious. Don't give it to just any old Tom, **** or Harry.
collectingthoughts collectingthoughts
18-21, F
1 Response Nov 28, 2012

You seem like a beautiful person. Whats the problem?

Thats very sweet of you to say! But, I guess for now I'm happy playing agony aunt :)